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Old 02-25-2008, 07:29 PM   #127
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I too hope that there is a next place we will once again share the laughter, the love, and the warmth they bring to our hearts.

So sorry hear of your loss. Our thoughts are with you.

Barry and Donna
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Old 02-25-2008, 07:30 PM   #128
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Well here I go again

Oh Anna, what a loveley creature. You can imagine what a big burly guy like me is doing right now...Allergies I tell ya', Allergies.

Anna is beautiful. When you hold her ashes tongiht, ask her to look up Chief, he is a Border Collie too. The can unionize doggie heaven and invent something complicated together.


My deepest sorrow for your loss.


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Old 03-08-2008, 08:56 PM   #129
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Man plans, God laughs and I cry

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Originally Posted by rettoc625
Man plans and God laughs.

I was laid off from my job six months ago and wondered how my husband and I would manage on half our former income. My dog's illness has cost more than $13000 for MRIs, CT scans, surgery, radiation and gas for the car to get him to treatment (at 30 bucks a day for 20 days it starts to add up!)

Well if I still had that miserable job, I would not have had the time to take my dog to his treatments, nor would I have been able to help my parents. My mother needed open heart surgery at the same time my dog was wrapping up his treatments. Both hospitals were in the same city just blocks from each other.

God knew what I needed - time - to care for family. God knew my husband's tiny VA disability check had been saved and invested and would cover all the expenses.

Our plan was to build a house with our big salaries and that little investment. Ha Ha Ha, said God, You need to build relationships right now. You need to care for family. The house will come when the time is right. You have a house to live in, care for the family you love.

God knew I could not be happy living in a big new house if it meant my mother and puppy would suffer. The best Christmas presents I can have will be with me.

There will be only one monument ever erected with my name on it and it will not be commissioned by my employer. It will be commissioned by my family.

Mary
Nearly three months ago I wrote this post thinking the worst events in my life were over and life would somehow get back to 'normal'. Well I don't understand God's plans anymore because after putting my 71 year old mother through the brutal ordeal of unexpected open heart surgery and a seemingly textbook perfect recovery, He took her on February 20, 2008. No complications from heart surgery, instead, something that looked like flu to the lay person.

God may be laughing, but my 77 year old father and I are crying. Life will never be 'normal' again.

Mary
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Old 03-08-2008, 09:18 PM   #130
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Our deepest condolences.

Mary,

All I can do is pray for your dad and his family and I will spend the evening prayers for you and your family too. From the bottom of my heart, I am so sorry for your loss.

John
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Old 03-09-2008, 12:36 AM   #131
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Mary, I am so sorry to hear of your Mom's passing. It is so hard to lose our parents, the hurt goes deep and it seems like it will never heal.

I know many times I will do something or learn of something and I'll think "Dad would enjoy this" or "Mom used to do that". I miss the happy birthday phone calls and the little old lady on the other end of the line gaily singing her heart out (both Mom and Mother in Law were the culprits). Interesting fact is that my parents always wanted an Airstream but never got out of the SOB habit until they built their cottage and then that took too much of their time. But they'd of loved ours, and that makes me feel a sense of accomplishment some times when I'm sitting out by a fire with the light reflecting off the shiny aluminum and think they are somewhere nearby watching and enjoying the quiet time with me.

I never really got to know my Father in Law as he passed at a relatively young age but I know Donna still gets that wistful look from time to time when something that would have suited him comes up.

That's the power and the beauty of the love we will always have for our Moms and Dads and siblings. The fact that they have passed is a reality we couldn't change but we keep them very much alive in our hearts and thoughts, we remember the things they did and the laughter and the tears over the years, and the love is no less today than it was when they and we were young.

It is hard to understand the why. I guess maybe we just aren't supposed to know the why but I am extremely hopeful that this was step 1 and we will be reunited in the next round. Thus, keeping in touch with them through those frequent thoughts and finding myself doing things they used to do that bugged me and now I think is just fine are a few of the ways I'm making sure I'll be ready to see them again. I'm not sure that makes sense, but when I find myself doing something they did it's like they are right there with me reminding me how to do it.

You and your Dad and the rest of your family are in our prayers tonight.

Barry and Donna
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Old 03-09-2008, 08:44 AM   #132
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Mary
MaryLou and I are very sorry for your loss. You and yours are in our prayers. Its not easy losing loved ones. Feburary was not good to us either. Feb 1 the loss of a brother-in-law and Feb 9 my baby sister and Feb 14 our 14 yr. old Mini-Schnauzer AMANDA ! Im 68 yrs old and Im not sure what the plan is either. I know there is one. Just hang in there Mary,never lost faith.
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Old 03-09-2008, 08:04 PM   #133
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Mary,

I can find no words to express our sympathy for your loss, but I thank you for attaching your original note. You said it then so eloquently ... "you need to build relationships ... care for the family you love." We grieve with you.
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Old 03-09-2008, 09:32 PM   #134
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Perhaps it was your mother's destiny to live only 71 years and you were given the chance to spend time with her before she had to go on. Now you have your father to share the memories of her life with. I lost both my parents, my father of ecoli on Halloween and my mother's heart stopped in my living room on Christmas Day. I know God was not laughing at my pain, he was telling me their time was over and they must go. I too still want to call and talk to them only to realize they won't answer the number I have called them at for 59 years. I will only hear their voices in my mind. 77 isn't old, take your dad on a trip in the AS. I wish I had that option. My father would have loved it.
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Old 03-10-2008, 03:03 PM   #135
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Mary, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Loosing a parent isn't easy, as I have found. But the bond between mother and daughter is especially strong and makes it even more difficult. Take comfort in your memories and relish the time you have left with your father.

Tom, AKA Minnie's Mate.
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Old 03-20-2008, 08:04 PM   #136
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Thank you

Thank you to everyone who have sent me private messages and posted condolences. After making my last post I had second thoughts that this may not be the place to express such raw emotion.

My father is under doctor's orders to stay with me for a couple weeks. His prescription is for lots of TLC and old fashioned home cooked meals. I have been enjoying every minute of what my father jokingly refers to as his prison sentence. His 'parole' date with his doctor is at the end of the month. My goal is to put a few extra pounds on his 109# body by then. I don't ask him if he wants to eat, I just cook something and put the plate in front of him. He hasn't pushed it away yet.

My DH has been absolutely wonderful. Without a word from me, he turned our lower level family room into a wonderful guest suite. He really busted his butt moving heavy furniture from one floor to another to set up a room with a bed, cable tv, high speed computer (even bought a new 22" flat monitor), refrigerator, microwave, table/chairs, new blinds, etc. It's wonderful to have a spouse who cares so much for my dad.

For now, I cook and listen. I hope someday my dad will want to live with or near me and my family.

Maybe God knew my father and I needed this time together. I am thankful for it.

Mary
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Old 03-20-2008, 11:23 PM   #137
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I understand completely

Quote:
Originally Posted by rettoc625
Thank you to everyone who have sent me private messages and posted condolences. After making my last post I had second thoughts that this may not be the place to express such raw emotion. Mary

Hi Mary, it is a funny thing(not ha ha but ironic). When Chief died, I thought the same thing, I was really torn up. Some days I thought, this is a dog, that is a parent, way different. But this group was incredibly kind and the therapy was cheap. With the price of gas and all, I think its a good way to go. I was a little embarrassed but the nice part about the internet and this forum is you can choose what you choose to read. It is does'nt help, let it fly.

Frankly, this group was far more understanding than many co workers or my family. If people answer you here, they have to hit reply, go out of their way to write to you and share the pain, grief and sorrow. Chances are, the are not making it up, not just blabbering. I may be blabbering right now but my heart is in the right place.

Point is, I really appreciated that you shared your mom's death with us, it helped me. We remain somewhat anonymous which is nice but I was overwhelmed with the feeling that even though I have only met one or two of you, You had me in your hearts, like we have you.

I am glad you are caring for your dad. Sometimes having a job to do helps you get through long enough so you can start thinking again. I am pretty sure I know how you feel, not exactly but close. As always, hang in there and remember that AS people are usually pretty decent.


John
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Old 03-21-2008, 12:18 AM   #138
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It's wonderful that you have made a place in your home for your dad. What could be more supportive than opening your doors to him, you have big hearts.
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Old 04-10-2008, 08:08 PM   #139
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Goodbye TTs

Today we sadly said good-bye to our last TT, Dahli. Fifteen and a half years ago the Tibetan Terrier breeder described her perfectly, "a sweet little girl." She got along with all of us, people, dogs, cats, sheep, and ducks. She might have been scolded three or four times in her life, but half of the times were probably because I was having a bad day. She struggled with renal failure since her brother Hoi died last June. It is so quiet here, we miss them so.

I'm attaching a small photo of Hoi (black) and Dahli with me on a trip in 2004. The handsome cat is Cooper, we lost him in March, 2007. We had a perfect family.

Bob and I began our trailering life in 2002, and have never camped without the TTs. Even though they are gone, I think we will remain BDandTTs.

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Old 04-10-2008, 09:10 PM   #140
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I'm so sorry to hear that. What a blessing to have fifteen years together though. She sounds like a wonderful friend.

We had a black TT in Barclay's puppy kindergarden. I had never heard of the breed before. That little girl was the absolute terror of the class! FULL of energy and didn't hesitate to bark when she wasn't getting her way. All in good fun though, not mean at all. She was really making her mom work for it though - that poor lady was exhausted every day by the end of class!
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