What I'll probably do this spring... and why
It’s below zero tonight and more snow is forecast for tomorrow. We’re cozy and snug in the house and the bauxite pickle is safe in an insulated barn. It’s time to sit on the recliner with a pet curled up at my feet and a book on my lap. My wife, also bundled up, sits on the couch leafing through the newspaper.
As the snow starts to fall, I cut my mind adrift and the thoughts begin to find their own way... In my mind it isn’t winter anymore, but Spring: warm, sunny Spring. We’re on the road, headed it-matters-not-where, when a tire blows. No worries, there’s a dusty bar and grill with parking right here.
I walk into the bar and it takes a few seconds for my eyes to adjust to the dark. My nose, however, adjusts immediately. A miasma of onions, light beer, and, maybe a little day old curry, which is puzzling until my ever widening pupils behold the cause of this eclipse, the biggest, greasiest biker ever to escape central casting. To my horror, he looks at me, points, and utters those three terrifying words: “You wanna dance?”
I blink. Hard. Finally stammering out a bewildered “Huh?”
“I said, the Auto Center’s having a sale on tires. Maybe we can get a spare for the trailer.” She lowers the paper and I get a look. One of those significant - "are you paying attention this time dear" looks.
I blink again and wipe the drool from my chin. It takes a second to chain the loose thoughts back down and realize it was my wife speaking, and another second to reconstruct what she just said.
“Yeah,” I reply as I look outside at the snow and shiver. “We really need to do that.”