What's your favorite, famous (or not) saying?

[N2XBW]

Things are so bad here, even the birds have bills!

[Mexray]

It's hard to beat Mark Twain for timeless thoughts that are as meaningful today as 100 years ago...a few of my favorites:

Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish.

Get your facts first and then you can distort them as much as you wish.

An ethical man is a Christian holding four aces.

Apparently there is nothing that cannot happen today.

The man who doesn't read good books has no advantage over the man who can't read them.

Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of congress. But I repeat myself.

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

The man with a new idea is a crank until the idea succeeds.

When angry, count four; when very angry, swear.

You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.

It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.

Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

The secret to success in life is to make your vocation your vacation.

If you have nothing to say, say nothing.

Have a place for everything and keep the thing somewhere else. This is not advice, it is merely custom.

I haven't a particle of confidence in a man who has no redeeming vices.

If I cannot smoke cigars in Heaven, I shall not go.

Let us endeavor to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.

Let us not be too particular; it is better to have old secondhand diamonds [Airstreams] than none at all.

Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough.

There are three things which I consider excellent advice. First, don't smoke to access. Second, don't drink to excess. Third, don't marry to excess.

When one has tasted watermelon he knows what the angels eat.

-Mark Twain

-[Mexray]

[Fyrzowt]

Mark Twain has some great ones, I would like to have met him.

[Mexray]

I'd be willing to bet Mark Twain was even more fun to listen to after a few shots while sitting in a Virginia City saloon, when he could really let his hair down...an American original!

[Fyrzowt]

Wouldn't it be fun (and funny) to get he and Will Rogers together? That would be a hoot!

[love vintage]

If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.

(My credo)

[Aage]

"In a hundred years from now, we'll all look back on this and laugh." - my dad's favourite saying

[N2XBW]

We Have Met The Enemy, And He Is Us ~ POGO [Walt Kelly]

[N2XBW]

"Why do people who know the least, know it the loudest?"

[N2XBW]

"My choice early in life was either to be a piano player in a whorehouse or a politician. And to tell the truth, there's hardly any difference. I, for one, believe the piano player job to be much more honorable than current politicians." --Harry Truman

[N2XBW]

Never make a defense or apology before you are accused. ~ Charles I of England

[love vintage]

"Honey bunch" courtesy of my Grandma, long since deceased.

[Pudentane]

He'd complain if they hung him with a new rope.

[N2XBW]

I don't mind going back to daylight saving time. With inflation, that hour will be the only thing I've saved all year. ~ Victor Borge