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Old 03-10-2008, 10:20 AM   #29
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Old 03-10-2008, 06:57 PM   #30
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LOL.. nice!
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~Burma Shave~
(one of the rhymes they had to take down b/c of complaints)
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Old 03-11-2008, 06:49 PM   #31
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What do they do with FAST WOMEN in NY?

They put a GOVERNOR on 'em!
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Old 03-13-2008, 05:25 PM   #32
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"Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker"

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Old 03-14-2008, 12:40 AM   #33
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A sign hanging out in front of a bar has this statement along with a picture of a woman who appears to be dressed as a hooker (don't want to stereotype you know):

Liquer in the front, poker in the rear
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Old 03-17-2008, 10:02 PM   #34
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A few days ago I was having some work done at my local garage. A very young woman came in and asked for a seven-hundred-ten. We all looked at each other and another customer asked, "What is a seven-hundred-ten?" She replied, "You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine, I have lost it and need a new one.." She replied that she did not know exactly what it was, but this piece had always been there.

The mechanic gave her a piece of paper and a pen and asked her to draw what the piece looked like. She drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710. He then took her over to another car which had its hood up and asked "is there a 710 on this car?" She pointed and said, "Of course, its right there." If you're not sure what a 710 is, click here http://www.hotautoweb.com/cogifs/710.jpg
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Old 03-18-2008, 12:10 PM   #35
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Originally Posted by wheel interested
A few days ago I was having some work done at my local garage. A very young woman came in and asked for a seven-hundred-ten. We all looked at each other and another customer asked, "What is a seven-hundred-ten?" She replied, "You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine, I have lost it and need a new one.." She replied that she did not know exactly what it was, but this piece had always been there.

The mechanic gave her a piece of paper and a pen and asked her to draw what the piece looked like. She drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710. He then took her over to another car which had its hood up and asked "is there a 710 on this car?" She pointed and said, "Of course, its right there." If you're not sure what a 710 is, click here http://www.hotautoweb.com/cogifs/710.jpg
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Old 03-18-2008, 12:44 PM   #36
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That is like so me, Paula.
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Old 03-21-2008, 08:43 PM   #37
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An Irishman walked past a pub.
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Old 03-22-2008, 12:26 PM   #38
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Happy Spring to all you good eggs out there.
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...and to all you not so good eggs too.
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Old 03-22-2008, 10:12 PM   #39
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wheel interested
A few days ago I was having some work done at my local garage. A very young woman came in and asked for a seven-hundred-ten. We all looked at each other and another customer asked, "What is a seven-hundred-ten?" She replied, "You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine, I have lost it and need a new one.." She replied that she did not know exactly what it was, but this piece had always been there.

The mechanic gave her a piece of paper and a pen and asked her to draw what the piece looked like. She drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710. He then took her over to another car which had its hood up and asked "is there a 710 on this car?" She pointed and said, "Of course, its right there." If you're not sure what a 710 is, click here http://www.hotautoweb.com/cogifs/710.jpg
I mighten not have got that one neither we spell it earl down in theses parts.
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Old 03-23-2008, 03:13 PM   #40
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Two Amish Womem were digging potatoes.
One held up a large spud in each hand and looking at them wistfully said,
"This reminds me so of my Amos."
The other woman's eyes widened as she asked increduously,
"So BIG is Amos?"
To which the first replied, "No, so dirty!"
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Old 06-27-2008, 05:08 PM   #41
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The Quest For Inner Peace

THE QUEST FOR INNER PEACE

I am passing this on to you because it definitely works and we could all use a little more calmness in our lives.

By following simple advice I heard on the Dr. Phil show, you too can find inner peace.

Dr. Phil proclaimed 'The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started and never finished.'

So, I looked around my house to see all the things I started and hadn't finished, and before leaving the house this morning,

I finished off 23 Buds, a bottle of Absolut, a package of Oreos, the remainder of my old Prozac prescription, the rest of the cheesecake, some Doritos and a box of chocolates.

You have no idea how freaking good I feel.
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Old 06-27-2008, 10:59 PM   #42
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Ya' know how some people spell "farmer"? E-I-E-I-O


iF A mandolin player is nervous, how can you tell?

Why did the chicken cross the road? That's where he parked his "coup".

Hey ladies, ever had a permanent? Where is it now?

Why are there more horses butts in the world than there are horses?
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