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Old 12-22-2012, 09:59 AM   #1443
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Merry Christmas fellow Hijackers! I toast to you all!


CHRISTMAS PUDDING

It was Christmas in the poorhouse,
The best time of the year;
And the paupers all were happy,
For their guts were full of beer.

In strode the poorhouse warden
And peered into their stalls.
He wished them all a Merry Christmas,
And the paupers answered "Balls."

The warden did not like this,
And he shouted "By the Gods!
You shall have no Christmas Pudding,
You ungrateful lot of sods."

Up spoke a grizzled veteran,
Who had stormed the Khyber Pass:
"We don't want your Christmas Pudding,
You can shove it up your ___."
Bravo, and cheers to you!
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Old 02-19-2013, 07:43 PM   #1444
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So it's Winter. Nuttin' going on. Too cold to camp. Y'all can't come up with a few good war stories? Maybe get an argument started over axles?

Jim
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Old 02-19-2013, 09:54 PM   #1445
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Really?

I know where an active bees nest is, gotta stick?

>>>>>Action
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Old 02-20-2013, 05:57 AM   #1446
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Thumbs up Good Morning....

.....


..


Bob
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“After all these years the reason I continue to love Thanksgiving.....I still sit at the kids table.”
RLC

Sandra wanted to go to Cleveland on vacation,
but I’m the Husband, so we went to Cleveland.
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Old 02-21-2013, 07:50 PM   #1447
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Really?

I know where an active bees nest is, gotta stick?

>>>>>Action
Naw, I guess everybody gave up Hijackin' for Lent. I just gave up complaining. It's been tough, let me tell you. Maybe I should try one of Bob's cup-o-Joe.

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Old 02-21-2013, 09:00 PM   #1448
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It's been tough, let me tell you .....

I went to a freak show and they let me in for nothing.
I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. He told me to wear a brown necktie.
I met the surgeon general. He offered me a cigarette!
I worked in a pet store and people kept asking how big I'd get.
My psychiatrist told me I'm going crazy. I told him...If you don't mind I'd like a second opinion...he said... All right...you're ugly too!

>Action
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Old 02-22-2013, 08:10 AM   #1449
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Thumbs up A Campfire Album....

A few new tunes for around the campfire this Season....

Imelda May - Gypsy - YouTube

Be thankful and hold hands for this one...
Imelda May - Kentish Town Waltz - YouTube

Bob
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“After all these years the reason I continue to love Thanksgiving.....I still sit at the kids table.”
RLC

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Old 03-01-2013, 09:02 PM   #1450
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Do any of y'all follow the "What's the cost of fuel..." thread? That thing has been smokin' lately. Pontification, fact smearin' and insults. Woooooo baby. Maybe we should start a new, more sedate thread for those guys. Maybe something like "Nuclear waste disposal, the positive aspects" or "Will the new Pope's native language be Spanish".

You know, just something to get things back down to earth.

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Old 03-02-2013, 08:50 AM   #1451
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50 Shades of grey

Four guys have been going to the same fishing trip for many years.
Two days before the group is to leave, Kevin's wife puts her foot down and tells him he isn't going.
Kevin's mates are very upset that he can't go, but ...what can they do.

Two days later the three mates get to the camping site only to find Kevin sitting there with a tent set up, firewood gathered, and dinner cooking on the fire.
"S..t ,Kevin how long you been here? How did you talk your missus into letting you go ?"

"Well, I've been here since last night. After dinner at home yesterday evening, I was sitting in my chair and my wife came up behind me and put her hands over my eyes and said, 'Guess who ?'"
I pulled her hands off, and she was wearing sexy brand new lingerie. She said had been reading 'Fifty Shades of Grey' and she had a devilish look in her eyes!!!
She took my hand and led me to our bedroom. The room had candles and rose petals all over.
On the bed she had handcuffs, and ropes !
She told me to tie her up and cuff her to the bed, so I did.

And then she said, "Do whatever you want."

So . . . . here I am !
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Old 03-03-2013, 08:28 AM   #1452
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I plowed the driveway today, and after doing so I sat down and had a cold beer.

The day was really quite beautiful, and the drink facilitated some deep thinking on various topics.

Finally I thought about an age old question: Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the n**s?

Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the
n**s. Well, after another beer and some heavy deductive thinking I have come up with the answer to that question.






Getting kicked in the n**s is more painful than having a baby and here is the reason for my conclusion: A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say, "it might be nice to have another child." On the other hand, you never hear a guy say, "You know, I think I would like another kick in the n**s."

I rest my case....time for another beer!
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Old 03-03-2013, 09:09 AM   #1453
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Quote:
Originally Posted by N2XBW View Post
I plowed the driveway today, and after doing so I sat down and had a cold beer.

The day was really quite beautiful, and the drink facilitated some deep thinking on various topics.

Finally I thought about an age old question: Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the n**s?
!
Ha!

One of the best descriptors of the pain of giving birth was "imagine taking hold of your upper lip and trying to stretch it back all the way over your head".

That's about it, IMO.


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Old 03-03-2013, 10:20 AM   #1454
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I'm with you N2'. I don't think I've ever gotten kicked "there", but I don't want to even think about it happening. I'd rather have my upper lip pulled over my head.

This thread is getting as exciting at "whaddya pay for gas today?"

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Old 03-07-2013, 06:57 PM   #1455
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You can't make this stuff up.

Carrie Fisher announced today that she will be reprising her role as Princess Leia in the next three Star Wars movies now in production.

There's at least a dozen jokes in there somewhere. Let the games begin!!!

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Old 03-08-2013, 09:54 AM   #1456
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You can't make this stuff up.

Carrie Fisher announced today that she will be reprising her role as Princess Leia in the next three Star Wars movies now in production.
She ought to be a queen by now.

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