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hampstead38 · 11-03-2009, 06:10 AM

Ah, Halloween, trick or treat. My daughter had a friend come over and we set up pumpkins and decorations in our driveway. So, between a place for "Ed" (our old truck), my daughter's friend's car, and the festivities, I moved my two-wheel drive Titan around the back.

Halloween was a success, and rather than move everything back, we just went to bed. Ah, but the evil spirits of Halloween decided to drop over an inch of rain overnight. Now... not having had quite enough sugar the night before, my daughter and her pal wanted doughnuts. So, in a semi-stupor I staggered out the Titan failing to notice the saturated ground.

ZZZZZZZZZZ. Under our fairly decent lawn is a layer of clay which takes on the characteristics of axle grease when wet. So, still not thinking clearly I thought I could get a little momentum rolling downhill and then "take an angle" back up to the pavement.

Roll, roll, ZZZZZZZZZZ. The tire treads are packed with oily, sticky, heavy clay. My police officer neighbor comes over and asks if he can help... maybe push. He and I push while my wife puts on a clinic on how NOT to get a truck unstuck, shooting mud about 75' into the other neighbor's yard. Thanks, I tell the guy, barely holding back the river of Navy profanity welling up in my chest. I have another plan.

So, I go to shop and drag out some lumber and my floor jack. Putting the boards under the rear differential isn't bad. Getting the 80 pound floor jack to move on the soft ground requires a fair amount of rolling around in the mud. Finally, I get the jack under the "pumpkin." Pump, pump, pump.... The boards sink into the goo and then eventually snap.

Rassa, frassa, guldruned, piece of.... get more wood. Roll in mud. Pump, pump, pump. Max height, barely get the rear wheels up. Get the snow chains out of the shop. Roll in mud, trying to get them on. Jack slides over... backstroke under the truck again, replace jack, pump, pump, pump.

Chains now weigh about 200 pounds, covered in clay. Finally get them on tires. Peel off jacket and turn inside out to protect truck seat from the mud. By this time, my wife is watching nervously from the kitchen window, having seen an expression on my face normally associated with axe murder or finding out someone has eaten the last piece of pie. I have decided the truck is going to the road. Drop the truck into reverse and finally move... right over my elderly neighbors tomato cages. I use the crunching as an indicator to go forward. The ZZZZZZZZ become a deeper sound as a dig my way towards the asphalt, leaving a pair of truly admirable ruts.

The truck rumbles to a stop on the road, but since I haven't moved the Halloween crap, I have to park in the front yard. Fortunately, though, I didn't get stuck there.

I go into the mud room and made it live up to its name. I then tell my wife, whatever we take with us, whereever we go.... four-wheel drive. While I'm almost positive I said those words in English, my gave me a look as if I had said something in Hindi... something she did not completely understand but was too polite to do anything but smile and nod.

Yes, the kids did get their doughnuts... and I bought seed, straw and topsoil to repair the lawn. Now... any recommendations on where to buy a couple of tomato cages?

Inland RV Center, In · 11-03-2009, 06:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hampstead38

Now... any recommendations on where to buy a couple of tomato cages?

Maybe Home Depot has some left, since tomatoe plants are a tad out of season.

Andy

85MH325 · 11-03-2009, 06:19 AM

That, kind sir, is EXACTLY why I'll never buy another two-wheel-drive truck!

Great post!!!!

Thanks for sharing this!

Roger

richinny · 11-03-2009, 06:37 AM

been there, did that. 4WD is no guarrantee you won't get stuck but adding in an anti-lock differential is a big plus. having pulled many an "invincible" 4WD out of going nowhere, my advise is to "pull from solid ground". 50' or 100' of winch cable with hooks can help keep your clothes clean. it is muck lighter than chain and stores easily. if i have to lie on the ground i charge a lot extra.

it really doesn't take much assist to drag something that runs under its own power :-)

stock of cages should be pretty good. this was a bad year to plant tomatoes because of the tomato blight. i can always ship you some from miami ;-)

oh, and after you clean up, don't forget to wash the bottom of the truck

kennethowens · 11-03-2009, 08:16 AM

Getting "stuck" can be a bit humbling. It happens to the best of us.
Ya know you're not doing much if ya never have problems. If a person
aint been stuck in their own back yard...they need a bigger back yard!

thecatsandi · 11-03-2009, 08:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hampstead38

Ah, Halloween, trick or treat. My daughter had a friend come over and we set up pumpkins and decorations in our driveway. So, between a place for "Ed" (our old truck), my daughter's friend's car, and the festivities, I moved my two-wheel drive Titan around the back.

[deleted]

Even though I have a 4 wheel drive truck I have a rear end locker installed.
I installed a ARB air locker in the rear end to replace my three times failed limited slip.
ARB 4x4 Accessories
Have not had to use it yet but intend on testing it this weekend. I will be placing weight in the rear before i try this. The bonus is I have an air compressor and 2 gallon tank on board. They run my air bags and I have a place to hook up a regular air line to fill tires if needed.

**moosetags** · 11-03-2009, 08:34 AM

I love your story. I thought that crap like that only happened to me. I'm sorry for your pain, but you made my morning.

Brian

nswhite · 11-03-2009, 09:31 AM

We were at an Escapees Rally in Sedalia, MO this year when it rained every day. Everyone got stuck regardless of what type vehicle they had. Tow truck operators had a field day hauling everyone out. Have tow insurance along with your 4WD.

1953 Flying · 11-03-2009, 09:38 AM

What a great story. The only thing missing are pictures. I can't believe no one took pictures...

kposey · 11-03-2009, 09:49 AM

Great story! We played in the mud in our yard this weekend too.

bredlo · 11-03-2009, 10:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1953 Flying

What a great story. The only thing missing are pictures. I can't believe no one took pictures...

I dunno... my first impulse may not to reach for a camera if my subject had "an expression on [his] face normally associated with axe murder or finding out someone has eaten the last piece of pie."

Unless, of course, the photos would come in handy at the upcoming homicide trial.

Wabbiteer · 11-03-2009, 11:17 AM

2WD is for going into the fray.
4WD for strategic retreats.

When back wheels try to pass front wheels at near zero speed there is a pit-of-the-stomach feeling that once experienced (with hours of invoked shovel work) forever lurks in the subconscious mind, or seat of the driver, which ever is smarter..

Winch & chains & cables & straps & block/tackle rigs to tie 4WD mud guppy to anything or series of things to retrace entry trajectory.

The single best recovery I've seen was my 88-year-old G'Uncle in his $80,000 Lexus snatching his golf cart out of a freshly harvest wheat field's clay upwelling "wet spot"...

FlashSilver · 11-03-2009, 11:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1953 Flying

What a great story. The only thing missing are pictures. I can't believe no one took pictures...

I think I know why there are no pictures. If you are anything like me, any camera pointed in your direction under those circumstances would be later extracted in a hospital emergency room.

mwells4654 · 11-03-2009, 12:52 PM

Great story - I have a locker in rear of my 2X4 GMC Truck - have not gotten stuck (YET).

oh2bcarefree · 11-03-2009, 12:55 PM

GREAT story, glad Mike and I aren't the only one's who get in these "situations." Hopefully you'll be able to laugh about it down the road...

4-wheel drive definitely will not keep you from getting stuck or guarantee that you will be able to get out. Last weekend we were at Bass Resort (not really a resort but a camp ground) and a 4x4 dually also woke up the next morning to find out that parking on the grass after all this rain we've been having he had sunk in the Ozark Mud. A backhoe had to come pull him out...

Tina
1948 Curtis Wright Vintage Kin

Foiled Again · 11-03-2009, 02:30 PM

I got stuck in my 2 wheel Silverado early this spring - wet grass with pure clay underneath. Slicker than a greased eel in a barrel full of snot.

Tractor pulled me out.

I did learn a useful trick though and have used it once since then - scrap carpet - 5 or 6 feet long. Jute side up, fiber side down - if you're not in axle deep it will feed itself under the tire and let you lift yourself out and start moving. Stay in second and EASY does it. .... Of course having a winch on the front bumper is better.

Paula

kstampa · 11-03-2009, 05:24 PM

great story. sorry for your muddy misery. my brother made the same vow after his experience in a Georgia farm field softened by 3 day soaking last Thanksgiving. My monster truck made quick work of it though so he didn't suffer long.

I think experiences like yours are why EVERYONE switches to 4WD.

Gene · 11-03-2009, 05:36 PM

Great story. I'm still laughing. I kept wondering if you would try to pull out the Titan with the Dodge and get it stuck too.

Gene

Gypsy Jo · 11-03-2009, 05:37 PM

I thought of the winch.idea and visions of front porch, back porch,neighbors vehicle,etc. being pulled into the backyard with the original vehicle.lol

hampstead38 · 11-03-2009, 06:21 PM

Well, folks, sorry about the lack of photos, but generally when I enter an out-of-body state of frothing rage... I'm not "camera friendly."

As a Montana native, growing up in beater 2WD trucks and being part of a logging family, I've been stuck a time or two or twenty. My standard "load out" when traveling the back country includes a hi-lift jack, a come-along, blocks, chocks, 100' feet of heavy duty chain, tire chains and a chain saw. In fact, my V bar chains were responsible for my rear yard rototilling. I was tempted to deploy the come-along and chains to my neighbors tree... but I thought it best to keep the rodeo limited to the backyard. Of course, that was before I ran over the tomato cages.

I hate getting stuck... mostly because I can think back to a moment before I was stuck when I thought... maybe this is a bad idea? Rather than listen to this very intelligent, very tiny part of my brain, the larger, stupid portion of my brain sends the signal down my spinal column telling my hands and feet to do something idiotic... like putting my arm around my date to the 9th grade dance. This is how something that would have been a nominally stupid move, like parking in backyard, becomes a specatularly stupid move, like getting horribly stuck in the backyard with an audience.

I realize 4WD is not a panacea. When I'm several stages beyond pissed off neither is having opposable thumbs. It is quite possible to get a 4WD even more stuck than a 2WD... but I would like to delude myself into thinking that having 4WD would give the small, too often ignored part of my brain that sends the "Danger Will Robinson" signal to the rest of the cortex a little more time. Of course, I'm probably just kidding myself, but when I'm calm and not covered in mud, I'm capable of higher level functioning like rationalization.