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Old 09-12-2014, 09:51 PM   #99
cwf
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Avenge yourself. Live long enough to become a problem to your children!
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Old 09-12-2014, 10:19 PM   #100
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It's not how much we have,
but how much we enjoy,
that makes happiness!
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Old 09-12-2014, 11:03 PM   #101
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Take me where I long to be
in my Airstream Flying Cloud!
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Old 09-12-2014, 11:04 PM   #102
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We don't know where
we are going
but we're on our way!
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Old 10-25-2014, 05:48 PM   #103
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Your comfort zone is a beautiful place, but nothing ever grows there.
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Old 10-25-2014, 10:35 PM   #104
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This is how I spent my children's inheritance.
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Old 10-29-2014, 04:48 PM   #105
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I hope everyone enjoys this.

An old man goes into the hospital for exploratory surgery. Time passes... and he come out of the surgery on a Gurney with an oxygen mask on and is brought into the ICU unit where a candy striper comes in and begins to wash the iodine and other disinfectants off his torso. As she is doing this the groggy old man asks thru his oxygen mask:
"Are my testicles black?"
The young candy striper replies "Iím sorry sir but Iíve been on the job a week and the first thing they told me was you must stay above the waste."
The old man becomes very agitated and begins yelling at her "Are my testicles black?"
The candy stripper is now getting very nervous and not knowing his condition lifts up his gown and member and examines him.

She looks him straight in the eyes, smiles, and say "You know your are really fine!"
With that the old man takes of his oxygen mask and says:
"That is really kind of you so say...BUT ARE MY TEST RESULTS BACK?
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Old 10-30-2014, 12:37 AM   #106
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"I think I can fix that..."
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Old 10-30-2014, 12:38 AM   #107
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They are no longer Birthdays...


Now they are 'maintenance intervals'....
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Old 10-30-2014, 02:21 AM   #108
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"Not all those who wander are lost" - Tolkien
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