IMHO there are so many gutted AS for sale that you would not recoup your investment, as people looking for a gutted AS are looking, like your wife, for the cheapest one around. Most buyers have no idea what's involved with an AS restoration.
IMHO If working on the AS is "living therapy" as you put it, then I would carry on with the build as your own project. I would just try and limit the cost as much as I could. Use recycled material for making cabinets or flooring, etc, etc, to limit possible marital strife.
If you finish the project and the wife is still not impressed then do you have other family members that could benefit from your labour of love? A beloved daughter perhaps whose family would love to use it?
You and your wife are not the first people to buy an AS based on an experience that happen a long time ago, before the age of bling and excess, only to realize that as you have aged, living without that extra room and amenities is a lot harder than you realized.
Per Mare, Per Terram and may all your campaigns be successful.
“It’s a recession when your neighbor loses his job; it’s a depression when you lose your own.” "Harry S Truman"