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Old 04-24-2016, 06:20 PM   #1135
Don't forget your cat nap
 
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OK, I think my garage door opener button on my new truck is possessed and may need the demons removed. I programed this thing when I got the truck and it worked fine. Then about a month ago it would only work off and on. Thursday it didn't work and all and same for Friday and Saturday morning. I tried to reprogram several times. Nothing worked.
Last night I tried for an hour with no success. I went to the Ford site this morning and saw a bunch of videos of how to program. I didn't watch any of them. Later went out to move the truck and for just the fun of it pushed the button to close the garage door. Of course it worked. Still is working now. If I had seen a candid camera person I probably would be in jail.
Why am I being picked on? Can I throw some kind of motor oil on the truck to get the demons out? If so, what weight would you recommend? It is a big diesel truck so I don't think anything like 3 in 1 oil would work but am open to anything.
Thanks in advance for your help.
If there is anything in that system that uses a battery (besides the big one in the truck), replace it. (the battery not the truck (or big truck battery))


Demons live in dry cell batteries.
Ken
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Old 04-25-2016, 09:50 AM   #1136
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I disagree. Demons do not live in dry cell batteries. Those are the ravings of a demon trying to confuse all us angels.

Best to throw the truck away. It is possessed and no amount of oil will help. Perhaps a gallon of urea sprinkled all over the truck, especially on the seats, will remove the threat, but it is dangerous to even be in the truck. You may grow a tail and horns. Have it towed to the crusher immediately. You ever see a photo of Henry Ford? He looked demonical to me.

I solved my demon problem by giving up on programming the garage door opener button in our SUV. It wasn't meant to be and I think the button doesn't do anything anyway. It is just another button on something that does something I never thought was important anyway.

I think all the mysterious buttons on electronic stuff are just there to make us feel inadequate and commit suicide so the robots who planned this can take over. Beware the robots! The clicker that goes onto the sunshade is good enough. I suspect my wife is a demon or a robot—every week she brings me her laptop and tells me it isn't working—in 10 seconds I solve the so called nonworking thing and somehow I think there is a plot by the demon-robot conspiracy and she is involved in it. I haven't figured out exactly what is happening, but I will.

I have to go now. The cat is sending me messages.

Gene
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Old 04-25-2016, 10:30 AM   #1137
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Is it me, or is my 'smart phone' a slow learner?

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Are you sure...Protag
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So when is this..."old enough to know better" supposed to kick in?
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Old 04-25-2016, 10:30 AM   #1138
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Fortunately, Airstreamers don't have to resort to those goofy aluminum foil hats to block out those evil radio waves from the alien demons. Just go inside the Airstream and you'll be safe.
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Old 04-25-2016, 10:34 AM   #1139
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Fortunately, Airstreamers don't have to resort to those goofy aluminum foil hats to block out those evil radio waves from the alien demons. Just go inside the Airstream and you'll be safe.
But be sure to block the windows with foil. Cover the vents too! And never stand over the shower drain because the demon in the gray water tank will grab your foot and drag you into the tank!

The cat made me post this.

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Old 04-25-2016, 10:38 AM   #1140
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The cat made me post this.
Cats are weird. They are really cold-blooded reptilian demons in disguise. Otherwise why would a critter covered nose to tail in fur want to lay in a sunbeam in the middle of summer to get warm when any smart dog is flopping down in a shady spot to cool off?
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Old 04-25-2016, 11:29 AM   #1141
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Cats are weird. They are really cold-blooded reptilian demons in disguise.
Agreed. My wife (suspected of demon-robot roots) and the cat bonded long ago. I am always careful around them. Barb has treated me wonderfully for 30 years, but who knows what will happen later today?

If you have a cat and it is perched above you, watch out when you walk by. He is thinking about jumping onto your neck, dispatching you and eating a big meal.

One of the cruel realities of life is that cats live much longer than dogs. Dogs are our friends, cats are waiting for a chance to eat you.

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Old 04-25-2016, 11:48 AM   #1142
Don't forget your cat nap
 
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Certain members of the human population of planet Earth fear cats, because cats are smarter than they are.

You must respect cats as superior beings, or they will get you.

They will not eat humans however, because the human diet is lousy. Mice, birds, snakes, and even rats taste better.


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Old 04-25-2016, 12:30 PM   #1143
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Dogs are our friends, cats are waiting for a chance to eat you.
That is why every cat who has ever owned me has been named for a type of food. Lunchmeat. Pumpernickel. Succotash. Just my way of getting a little bit back.
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Old 04-25-2016, 12:52 PM   #1144
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I don't much like cats. But I fear cucumbers.
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Old 04-25-2016, 02:27 PM   #1145
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Cats are GREAT.....it's the owners that worry me.

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So when is this..."old enough to know better" supposed to kick in?
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Old 04-26-2016, 11:55 AM   #1146
Don't forget your cat nap
 
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I don't much like cats. But I fear cucumbers.
Perhaps, that fear is justified. You never know where they've been.

Ken
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Old 04-26-2016, 01:18 PM   #1147
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I wouldn't want to eat either of them. Cucumbers taste bad to me and I don't even want to speculate what cat tastes like. They do make nice slippers though.

Barb's cat slipped on the tile today and never even acted like he didn't do it. He's gotten arrogant in his old age (16), just like me. It is not genetic.

But cats and flu and demons are old stuff. How about millionaires from Queens, NY? I knew one down the block named Donald back around 1950 and he was a jerk then at 4 or 5 years old. Same bad personality then and none of the neighborhood kids wanted to have anything to do with him. Maturity escaped him.

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Old 04-26-2016, 02:47 PM   #1148
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I don't much like cats. But I fear cucumbers.
Sigmund would have a lot to say about that. BTW what are your feelings about cigars?
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