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Old 08-06-2016, 12:09 PM   #1
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Pockets... Full of necessary 21st Century doo dads

Men wear pants with pockets.

Two front pockets. One with a pocket watch, pocket.
Two back pockets.

My back left pocket holds my handkerchief.
- blow my nose into it, fold and stuff back into the pocket
- forehead sweat into eyes, a head band
- wipe your brows, cleaning rag and many other pleasant uses.

My back right pocket secures my wallet.
- after a lifetime of having a wallet, my butt has an indent that requires a wallet
- without a wallet in the pocket, it just does not feel right (pick pocket deterrent)
- cash, credit cards, ID's and other valuable items

My front left pocket holds accessory items.
- finger nail clippers.
- loose change
- stuff found that might be useful and needs temporary storage
- trailer keys when trailer is in tow

My front right pocket controls the expensive assets.
- house keys, out building key, vehicle key(s)

This has all been routine since I could afford pants with pockets. I used the watch pocket for awhile with my wife's father's pocket watch that needed winding. Bent over and somehow the protected glass... cracked. Too much trouble, so quit using that pocket. Obsolete with my watch, now.

But... the keys. Three house keys and a slim truck key fit perfect. I actually have wear marks on my front right key pocket and rear right wallet pocket.

The new Ford Truck has a key that is the size of a large bulky pocket knife. While working in the yard I would bend over to pick up branch clippings... the truck's tail lights would flash, on and off. I thought it was my wife setting up the electronics to all the crap we seem to need to travel today.

Again, I noticed the lights on the truck flashing. At least it was not starting and shutting down. Just opening and locking the door, I discovered. My wife was working in the garden, trimming back her projects from jungle to stumps. She thought I was going senile, when I asked her "what are YOU doing?"

Never had this issue, before.

So today... I need a FIFTH pocket for the massive truck key. I am not going to be wearing a fanny pack or a man purse. I will sell this Ford Truck before I stoop that low. I may have to get a climber's carabiner and attach all of these keys onto a pants loop... but have my belt holding my pants onto my hips, seems to be enough stress on the belt loops, already.

What do I do? Everything is necessary that I carry. Should I wear a hat and stuff all this into the space above my head?

HOW did you adapt to the 21st Century? I am already overloaded and ready to blow out a shoe due to too much cargo.

Where does one put all this stuff, once your pockets exceed the maximum cargo load limitations?

PS... I did find a dime at the IHop parking lot today, and a nice 5/8 inch washer that appears to be new... went into the left pocket with available space.
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Old 08-06-2016, 12:26 PM   #2
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I put my keys on a keyring with a clip that I can attach to a belt loop, and just let them hang instead of trying to stuff them into a pocket— ever since I wore a hole in a pocket from chafing the fabric with the keys. Pockets with holes aren't good for carrying anything.

Since I never carried a pocketwatch, I've always used the watch pocket for loose change— if I wear pants that even have one. Easier than digging to the bottom of a front pocket. But Levi Strauss jeans are just about the only pants that come with a watch pocket anymore.

Also, now that I'm retired and don't need to dress up, I wear pants with cargo pockets. One cargo pocket carries my Samsung Galaxy "large size for old eyes" smartphone. That way I never have to worry about "butt-dialing" anybody the way I would if it was in a hip pocket. The other cargo pocket carries my glucose test kit and insulin pen.
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Old 08-06-2016, 01:11 PM   #3
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I was setting off my panic alarm during Easter dinner. Try using the empty pocket for the pocket watch that you no longer use. The key fob should fit nicely.
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Old 08-06-2016, 01:46 PM   #4
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I've got the same problem Ray.
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Old 08-06-2016, 02:01 PM   #5
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No worries, get a small tactical belt pouch for little bulky items like Ford keys.

http://www.ebay.com/itm/Outdoor-Tact...-/152193961692

https://www.amazon.com/Horizontal-Ru.../dp/B00XZMAVGS
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Old 08-06-2016, 03:00 PM   #6
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No worries, get a small tactical belt pouch for little bulky items like Ford keys.

http://www.ebay.com/itm/Outdoor-Tact...-/152193961692

https://www.amazon.com/Horizontal-Ru.../dp/B00XZMAVGS
*******

I will have to look. Sounds like a camouflaged 'man purse' to me. Now an 'Ammo Belt' in Army Green... that would pass muster.

Also do not need a Hernia Belt, no matter how handy.

I see these guys with a key ring and four pounds of keys hanging from their waist. Want to avoid that as well, but might be a woman catcher as they like shiny objects.

Same key as Thalweg's photo. If I move wrong, I could need stitches.
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Old 08-06-2016, 03:10 PM   #7
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I see what I saw and seen plenty...

SeeMore... I saw all I could see and more than I needed to see, had I saw it when it was seen on EBay before seeing is believing.

Pretty ingenious 'belt additives' on EBay. Someone is getting rich, when more stuff is required to be pocketed.

Protagonist... you obviously have not been following the national news and 'cargo pants'. Better yet, those with the zippered leg extenders, in the event you want to cross a creek, you can remove the section below your knees. Just do not lose one in moving water, it cannot be recovered.

Naw... too many pockets and for some, bending over to find one may be an issue.
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Old 08-06-2016, 03:12 PM   #8
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I will have to look. Sounds like a camouflaged 'man purse' to me.
Nope. The first hyperlink shows a pouch that is just barely big enough to hold an old-fashioned flip-phone*, about the size of a pack of cigarettes or a Gerber multi-tool. Not man-purse sized at all.

*When exactly did flip-phones become old-fashioned, anyway?
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Old 08-06-2016, 03:18 PM   #9
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One word you guys. Purse.
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Old 08-06-2016, 03:18 PM   #10
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Big purse.
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Old 08-06-2016, 03:22 PM   #11
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Protagonist... you obviously have not been following the national news and 'cargo pants'.
I haven't paid a lot of attention to the national news and stories about financial celebrities and cargo shorts. I don't wear cargo shorts. Except when swimming or kayaking, I don't wear shorts at all. When I was growing up in southwest Oklahoma where machismo was defined by cowboys and Mexican immigrants, adults wore long pants, kids wore shorts, period. No one ever took seriously a grown man wearing shorts in those days in that part of the country; they were considered childish. So my cargo pants go all the way down to my feet and all the way up to my waist, the way adult pants are supposed to.
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Old 08-06-2016, 03:24 PM   #12
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A belt mounted flip phone man purse?

It was bad enough having a Slide Rule attached to your belt back, before Texas Instrument hand calculators were portable and affordable. Cannot even use it as a ruler... today.

The number of Airstream keys at least have been reduced since 2006. I offered advice that each lock does not need a separate key. Well, at least today the outside storage locks use the same key on the exterior access.

... And two keys for the front door? Does an Airstream engineer believe that by adding a second lock with a different key, doubles security?

I still own my IBM Selectric typewriter that cost me $1,000 plus extra for the type face 10 and 12 pica removable balls. Stack that onto my Slide Rule, my Texas Instrument SR50-A that also attached to a belt. Someday... they will be worth a lot as early novelty man belt purse predecessors.
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Old 08-06-2016, 05:41 PM   #13
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Pockets... Full of necessary 21st Century doo dads

Meh. I'm honorably retired. I can dress however I want. Short or long cargo pants--depends on what I'm doing.

Fanny packs, however, WILL get your 'man card' revoked. 😀😀😀

Worse yet, I still have my K&E Deci-Lon slide rule, and the book, and I still know how to use it. Sad sack that I am.... In fact, I have two of them, one 10", the other 20". Plus the orange scabbard that bounced off my hip between classes. Even sadder, I guess. I've threatened to mount them in a glass front box, marked "in case of computer failure, break glass"

This might have something to do with my youngest daughter referring to me as the 'world's oldest computer nerd'


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Old 08-06-2016, 05:59 PM   #14
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I still own my IBM Selectric typewriter that cost me $1,000 plus extra for the type face 10 and 12 pica removable balls. Stack that onto my Slide Rule, my Texas Instrument SR50-A that also attached to a belt.
My slide rule got a lot of use in college back in the 70's when pocket calculators were new and expensive toys not allowed in the classroom lest they give the wealthy students an unfair advantage over the less affluent ones. When I bought my slide rule, I really wanted a fancy wooden one, but I ended up with a white plastic one because they were cheaper.

Then my slide rule sat in a drawer at home for over 20 years, until 1999, when it was proudly displayed in my office— and demonstrated for youthful coworkers who were younger than my career and had never even seen a slide rule— as my Y2K-compliant backup computer in the days leading up to the biggest non-event in modern history, when the media had everyone convinced that the Y2K "bug" would bring civilization to its knees on New Year's Day 2000AD because media hacks never understood that to a computer, 1/1/00 was actually just day 2451545 on the Julian calendar, nothing special at all.
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