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Old 02-12-2004, 05:39 AM   #1
nds
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Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 240
On the Lighter Side...

I received these in an email this morning and thought I'd share....

Food For Thought

I'm a psychic amnesiac. I know in advance what I'll forget.

Ever wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

I worry that the person who thought up Muzak may be thinking up something else.

I don't do drugs; nowadays I get the same effect just by standing up really fast.

Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.

I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

Mental backup in progress - Do Not Disturb!

Mind Like A Steel Trap - Rusty And Illegal In 37 States.

Quantum Mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of.

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.

Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.

When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.

I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.

How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?

Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humor.

Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!

OK, so what's the speed of dark?

Black holes are where God divided by zero.

All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.

I tried sniffing Coke once, but the ice cubes got stuck in my nose.
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Old 02-12-2004, 08:02 AM   #2
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The humor of Steven Wright.

What ever happened to that guy? .. I never see him anymore.
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Old 02-12-2004, 02:58 PM   #3
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Quote:
Originally posted by Porky Pig
The humor of Steven Wright.

What ever happened to that guy? .. I never see him anymore.
He's Playing Athens a couple weeks ago. Was thinking about going but it was a little bit of a haul.
Closest to you he will be for the next few months will be Vegas on 4/22
http://www.stevenwright.com/live/index.shtml
http://www.stevenwright.com/

Dom Irara(sp) was just here.

I think what happend is shows like Live at Dangerfields and a night at the Improve are no longer airing.
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