Nonsensical but true

[Isuzusweet]

Caveat: I do have a warped sense of humour, as do others.

Recently a topic arose about handling a tornado situation. There were lots of posts with all the serious information about what, and what not to do.

I however wrote this reply:

Travel with a chicken, one for every occupant of your vehicle. Other than the obvious benefit of fresh eggs every morning, chickens can't fly and therefore are tornado proof.
Stay away from cows, barns, semi tractor trailers and anything heavy, it's a chicken you want to have a hold on to save your life.

For proof, find me a twister movie that shows a chicken getting thrown around.

Which was followed by these replies:

Chickens? What a foul suggestion . . .
Where do you buy chickens.
Any grocery store. Dead chickens don't fly any better than live ones do!

To which I replied

Very true, very true, but scientists have confirmed the feathers do have an aerodynamic spoiler effect to aid in a flightless trajectory; so a stuffed chicken would do, if carrying a live one was messing up the carpet a bit.

Now I'm pretty positive that most people will see the humour in this, but the image of some poor person hanging onto a chicken while piloting a trailer through a tornado did cross my mind.

So in order not to hijack anymore threads with my warped brand of humour I have decided to start a nonsensical thread. All submissions must have some basis in fact but cause you to question its basis.
Any replies that make sense, or determine to answer the premise with facts will be banned for life (from what you will be banned from, I don't know).

Cheers
Tony

[Isuzusweet]

The population of the earth is increasing in leaps and bounds, is the earth getting heavier because of this?

If not, but all mass comes from the earth, at what point does the earth end up being a hollow shell with a crap load of people on it?

If we as humans are sucking mass and material from the earth, are we then the cause of sink holes in Florida? Could this be the first signs of the apocalypse?

Points to ponder.
Cheers
Tony

[overlander63]

The best way to avoid a tornado is to be where it isn't.

[OTRA15]

sense

[Protagonist]

A few years back, a British scientist proved that global warming causes ice ages. Follow along if you will.
The earth is three-quarters covered in water, more-or-less.
Global warming makes temperatures hotter and melts ice caps and glaciers, meaning there's even more water. So far so good.
But global warming also causes increased evaporation of water.
Which means more cloud cover because evaporated water is what makes clouds.
White clouds reflect sunlight back into space, so more clouds reflect more sunlight. Even clouds that are dark underneath are white on top, as you can see from satellite photos.
Reflecting more sunlight back into space means the Earth gets colder.
More clouds also mean more precipitation.
And since the Earth gets colder from the cloud cover, more precipitation falls as snow.
If there's more snow, then over time some of it won't melt before the next snowfall and eventually some of it won't melt at all.
Snow that doesn't melt all year builds up to become icecaps and glaciers.
If icecaps and glaciers get larger, that's an ice age.
So there you have it. Global warming causes ice ages.

[ColoradoLady]

Protagonist......now that makes more common sense than anything the bleeding heart liberals in D.C. are currently spouting! Coming from an engineer, is it true....? All this snow we are experiencing this year, makes one wonder. After all, ElNino began in the overly warmed waters at the equator!? How do we explain a spring of ....70's, then 3-4 days of cold and snow...repeat, repeat, repeat......

[Protagonist]

Originally Posted by ColoradoLady

Protagonist......now that makes more common sense than anything the bleeding heart liberals in D.C. are currently spouting! Coming from an engineer, is it true....? All this snow we are experiencing this year, makes one wonder. After all, ElNino began in the overly warmed waters at the equator!? How do we explain a spring of ....70's, then 3-4 days of cold and snow...repeat, repeat, repeat......

It actually might be true. But it will take longer than any of us have left to see for sure.

[DKB_SATX]

Originally Posted by ColoradoLady

Protagonist......now that makes more common sense than anything the bleeding heart liberals in D.C. are currently spouting! Coming from an engineer, is it true....? All this snow we are experiencing this year, makes one wonder. After all, ElNino began in the overly warmed waters at the equator!? How do we explain a spring of ....70's, then 3-4 days of cold and snow...repeat, repeat, repeat......

Assuming for the sake of discussion this is true (I haven't researched it) the question you'd have to ask is a) how long would it take to increase the cloud cover to the point at which the albedo would start the cooling, and b) how long would it take to cool. If the timescale is thousands of years, those "bleeding heart liberals" *and* the apocryphal British scientist could both be correct.

[Protagonist]

Originally Posted by Isuzusweet

All submissions must have some basis in fact but cause you to question its basis.
Any replies that make sense, or determine to answer the premise with facts will be banned for life (from what you will be banned from, I don't know).

Originally Posted by DKB_SATX

Assuming for the sake of discussion this is true (I haven't researched it) the question you'd have to ask is a) how long would it take to increase the cloud cover to the point at which the albedo would start the cooling, and b) how long would it take to cool. If the timescale is thousands of years, those "bleeding heart liberals" *and* the apocryphal British scientist could both be correct.

Ha! Finally, a chance to ban a moderator! Banned from what, I don't know either…

Don't question the premise, just go with the flow…

[ColoradoLady]

If more people live in China, the Middle East, Africa ....than in the USA....why doesn't the earth WOBBLE ON IT's AXIS???

[Protagonist]

Originally Posted by ColoradoLady

If more people live in China, the Middle East, Africa ....than in the USA....why doesn't the earth WOBBLE ON IT's AXIS???

They would only make it wobble if they all jumped up and down at the same time!

Actually, the Earth really does wobble, but for a different reason. Since this is the "Nonsensical but True" I'm forbidden from saying why.

[Airtandem]

I just read where the North Pole has moved; Is this part of the wobble?
Good question Evelyn, I thought the same thing with the population increase in these areas and the construction. Wouldn't have the same effect as a pitcher throwing a "spit ball"?

[AtomicNo13]

Here's my theory on filling up all the landfills and dumps.
If we do this then we increase the circumference of the planet therefore making more room for human inhabitants.... see? I have to be correct just like the chicken theory!
I'm adding a chicken tractor to the rear bumper of my Airstream and I don't care about weak frame and that whole moment arm effect thing. Its all a hoax....

[tevake]

The subsurface magma acts as a ballencer, like our centramatics. Too many folks in one spot and the magma shifts around to smooth things out.

Cheers Richard

[AtomicNo13]

So how do you explain all the people in china? Why haven't we gone hurtling off in space?

[Sbb]

I'm so confused nd loving it.

[Piggy Bank]

Richard is onto something.

Volcanic eruptions can cause so much particulates to get into the stratosphere that global temperature changes occur.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1815_e..._Mount_Tambora

[Protagonist]

Originally Posted by AtomicNo13

So how do you explain all the people in china? Why haven't we gone hurtling off in space?

Because Asians are generally smaller than Europeans and Americans (shorter AND skinnier), so it takes fewer of us to balance them out.

[markdoane]

Originally Posted by Protagonist

Because Asians are generally smaller than Europeans and Americans (shorter AND skinnier), so it takes fewer of us to balance them out.

Americans outweigh asians by 50 lbs. I'm suprised the North American tectonic plate doesn't sink.

[overlander63]

Originally Posted by AtomicNo13

So how do you explain all the people in china? Why haven't we gone hurtling off in space?

Who says we haven't?