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Old 08-12-2005, 03:34 AM   #15
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As I've heard it often said....

"Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer." What's painful is not so much the theft of your idea, but rather the betrayal factor, and as overlander63 has so eloquently pointed out, a real 'friend' wouldn't never do that. Having been in this same position, we'd suggest you suck it up, do 'way mo betta' and be thankful you found your 'friend' out in time.

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Old 08-12-2005, 05:45 AM   #16
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Originally Posted by Pick
Overlander63, I have a Phillips DVD player. I can't find the rewind button, and the dang video store keeps charging me a rewind fee. I hope your gadget goes to market before I go broke.
Ya shoulda waited a year on that new fangled Eelectronic Eequipment...ours has a rewind button...and believe it or not I caught my wife using to rewind DVD's I guess she has blond roots....


__________________ many little time...
Why are we in this basket...and where are we going
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Old 08-12-2005, 06:01 AM   #17
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trust-1. assured reliance on anothers integrity,veracity, justice, etc,; confidence. rare . trustworthiness.

where is your trust now? i know where mine would be.....i hope you quickly resolve your dilemma.
Illegitimous noncarborundum(dont let the bastards wear you down)

The only true nobility is found through giving good food to your friends- Anton Careme

beauty is in the eye of the beerholder-cosmo fishhawk

if something is too good to be true, its usually gone before i get there-mister boffo
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Old 08-12-2005, 06:27 AM   #18
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I say follow through with your dream and out do this so called friend.
You have the smarts to come up with the idea and have been thinking about it longer. I think that you will rise above.
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Old 08-12-2005, 06:46 AM   #19
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I think your former friend decided for you that the relationship was over the moment he/she went off on their own with your idea. This is a clear violation of trust. This is an example of your friend putting their wants and needs ahead of yours. Pure and simple this person is not a friend to you. If you choose to continue to try to be a friend to this person they will continue to use you advance their needs, not to support your needs being advanced.

Documentation. Do you have your idea established in a document? Can you establish a date on that information? Establish it now. First to market is one key strategy in business. Your friend is attempting to beat you with this strategy. Not knowing your idea, but assuming you and your friend are geographically co-located, you need to decide to get in or be happy for your former friend.
72 Sovereign: L couch, mid-twin, rear-bath
"When you come to a fork in the road, take it"
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Old 08-12-2005, 07:25 AM   #20
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I'm thinking of starting an "airstream storage facility" business. I hear there's a big market for that sort of thing around here.

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Old 08-12-2005, 08:19 AM   #21
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Prescription for Solution

As a malpractice practitioner of incompetence I find that a brief period of sitting in my Airstream solves my problems.
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Old 08-12-2005, 08:22 AM   #22
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Question "Friend--a person who one knows, likes, and trusts."

Here's a nickel's worth. That's the definition in my dictionary. I think the key concept for me is trust and loyalty as part of friendship. Then again I'm a little old fashioned, read vintage! LOL.
Steph in MI Air# 6996-
I Hockeytown USA!!
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Old 08-12-2005, 08:25 AM   #23
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I'm probably in the minority here, but bobechs gets my vote for the best 5-cent shrink. His reply might not be sugar-coated, and thus is a little harder to swallow, but he makes many valid points and in fact most of what was written is pretty-well irrefutable. This little nugget is especially worth repeating:

"So I say yeah, get over your cheap self. If you think you have what it takes, just do it. Your friend either has what it takes or doesn't, too. But I think the fact that your friend, who knows you better we do, in effect estimated that you were more show than go speaks volumes."

The only thing I could possibly add is if you feel deeply slighted by your friend's actions, write that person off as a friend and move on. I've been screwed by "friends" in the past and they are definitely friends no longer. Ending the friendships completely was ultimately for the best and I have no regrets. I guess that's why when you're younger you have lots of friends and as you grow older you tend to weed out the a-holes. IMHO if you are over the age of 30 and have more than one "best" and five "very close" friends, then you are either very lucky or a fool. Just my 2 cents. P.
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Old 08-12-2005, 08:32 AM   #24
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try the mafia,voodo,or just pray she fails...............
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Old 08-12-2005, 12:43 PM   #25
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Tell her she can be your first franchizee and will only take 5% of her gross.

If she can't agree to those terms, maybe she should "forget about it!".
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Old 08-12-2005, 01:10 PM   #26
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Does not sound like much of a friend to me.

That said, it's not the idea itself that causes success or failure of a new venture - it's your ability to execute to it and make it successsful. In our business we have faced incumbent competitors and spawned copy cat upstarts, we've had employees leave to become competitors, industry partners turn on us and 800 pound gorillas threaten to squash us. There have been many moments when we wonder what and why we're doing what we're doing - despite many outisde opinions business is personal and its personally painful to feel betrayed or threatened.


We consistantly gain in our marketplace because we can out execute them on most days and in most situations. And so we do. So should you.

I would tell her how you feel. Then go ahead with your vision and win in the "free world" marketplace.
Steven Webster
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Old 08-12-2005, 01:57 PM   #27
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Yukionna, the exact same thing happened to my wife in 1968. We were very poor at the time, and we needed every penny to stay out of debt. I'm afraid we still feel betrayed, after 37 years, and we lost what we wrongly considered to be a friend. We should have long forgotten this episode, but human beings are often strange vulnerable creatures. The only comfort I can offer is that your emotions indicate your humanity, while the actions of your "friend" indicate a betrayal of all that is best in us. Nick.
Nick Crowhurst, Excella 25 1988, Dodge Ram 2500 Cummins Diesel. England in summer, USA in winter.
"The price of freedom is eternal maintenance."
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Old 08-12-2005, 02:30 PM   #28
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I'm with Peter&Denise, bobechs, and swebster. As an entrepreneur (on my third company and fourth product launch) I know that ideas are a dime a dozen. It's execution that counts.

But even if you weren't *really* going to do anything with your idea, it still doesn't excuse her rudeness. The primary thing that this person stole from you was your perception that she was your friend. I would guess that's what hurts the most and I sympathize with how you must feel about that.


PS: Bobechs is also right about how greenhorns are always the ones trying to keep their ideas secret. For many new businesses, the key need is to tell the story to as many people as possible, to get them interested in helping you and investing.

Here's an example: My brother and I had an idea for a snow sled. Not very original, right? We told EVERYONE about it, just to test the waters and get ideas. Then we did some development work, filed patents for the key components and design, and went about raising money. Throughout the process the most important thing was to keep talking. I did many public speaking engagements to raise awareness. The only thing we kept secret was our exact business plan (investors only) and the specifics of our patent filings.

The result is at [BEGIN SHAMELESS PLUG] (also to be found at EMS, LL Bean, Harrington, FAO Schwartz and other fine retailers this Christmas!) [/END SHAMELESS PLUG]

Former full-timer | AIRSTREAM LIFE magazine | Tour of America (old blog) | Man In The Maze (current blog)

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