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Old 04-02-2007, 12:01 PM   #71
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Talking Shep? Someone mention Shep!!

Originally Posted by Jean Shepherd did all right with [u
Midnight Dreams of Wanda Hickey[/u]. If you haven't read it, beg borrow or steal a copy, it is wonderful! .
Jean Shepard, the greatest midwest humorist/sage since "Mark Twain" used the redneck Bumpus family next door in a couple of stories and reused them again in the Christmas Story. I think Wanda Hickeys Night of Golden Memories devotes two or three chapters to this picture of "neighbors from hell." First time I read it I nearly peed myself from laughing so hard.
Shep's tribute site will fill you in on his life and writings. Jean Shepherd - A Salute to Jean Shepherd
Got to go check my bookshelves and reread this again. It never gets stale.


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Old 04-02-2007, 01:24 PM   #72
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ok, it's been a year, how are things working out? the picture of the cherrypicker with the guy cutting down limbs was enough to give me nightmares? any updates?

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Old 04-02-2007, 09:05 PM   #73
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Deer Camp Deliverance

This thread is great! I laughed the whole way through (with a wry smile, since I know EXACTLY how you feel...)!

We moved from a nice suburb of Dallas to the back woods of Arkansas three years ago for my husband's job. We will leave here when it is over in about 2012 and hope to return to Texas. But for now, we have 10 acres in the piney woods about 2 miles from the highway on a gravel road through hunting lands leased from the forestry management division of the paper mill. We have three mules, a horse, a donkey, a puppy and two cats. It's country out here. Here's our Deliverance story--cue the banjos...

The owner of the deer camp (place where hunters camp out in their ramshackle trailers--actually similar to the place we got our Excella from) you have to drive by to get to our house, Pop Tillman, passed away several weeks ago. I think he was in his early 70's. Apparently he was revered in this neck of the woods, but the only encounters we have had with him have been weird. He looked like a jovial Santa Claus with his overalls, white-ish (okay, yellow) beard and mustache, and large figure, but he drank straight whiskey constantly (morning, noon and night) and when he spoke, you could sometimes pick out a decent word or two from all of the obscenities that consisted of the bulk of his conversation. We called him "Bad Santa." He apparently died of lung cancer, and the picture that was used for his obituary should show you why, and is a good example of his demeanor (I have attached it). His truck was parked up in Redfield (the little town up the road) for a few days, and it gathered quite a bunch of memorial flowers and other objects.

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So I am working outside the garage that weekend, using the compressor to air up a low tire on my old full-size Jeep. All of a sudden I hear hootin' and hollerin' coming from the general vicinity of the deer camp, and a bunch of car horns interspersed with shotgun/rifle blasts. Something whings over my head about six feet, so I yell "HEY!!!" real loud and duck into the garage behind the wooden divider between the doors and wait for the shooting to end. It gets louder and louder, and so do the car horns and the hollerin'. I hear a bunch of engines and the noises all go on down the road and die off after a little bit, so I go back outside and finish my work. I tell my husband Brad they probably took him for one last ride around the deer camp, envisioning something like "Weekend at Bernie's" where the dead guy goes through all sorts of adventures, slumped over between two guys or hanging out in a chair at the pool. I am being mostly facetious at this point.

Just a little bit later that day, our renter went to work and called Brad to say as he passed the deer camp that he saw a big canopy tent with a bunch of chairs under it, and an empty hearse with the back door open, and no people around anywhere. Bad Santa's truck was there, covered with memorial flowers. We later found out they DID take him for one last ride around the deer camp, although he was in a coffin in the back of a truck, not slumped between two guys in the cab like the vision that had flashed through my head!

Hoo boy. Do we live in the back woods of Arkansas or what!?!
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Old 04-02-2007, 11:32 PM   #74
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Quite a story!
Unfortunately, the states may change, but the "rednecks" are the same all over. We've got them out here too, big time.
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Old 04-02-2007, 11:36 PM   #75
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Oh boy, you are not kidding. How does this happen in the days of "no child left behind....?"
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Old 04-02-2007, 11:39 PM   #76
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yeah, redneck is a state of mind, not a geographical location! and the term redneck is not meant as a derogatory term. it is basically a farmer and don't they hold the backbone of the country? the people in this story are just plain weird! hope it is working out better for you!
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Old 04-03-2007, 06:40 AM   #77
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Down Here................

..................we call the 'Good Ole'Boys' ...."CRACKERS". I know there's a story behind the name, but I don't remember it right now. They all drive the mandatory raised pick-up, smoke like fiends, have their wives/girlfriends glued to their right side as they drive, wear beaten up straw cowboy hats (after we ARE on the west coast........of Florida, that is) use chew and drink Bud!

They look like a Jeff Foxworthy characature of what a 'redneck' SHOULD be
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Old 04-03-2007, 07:28 AM   #78
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What a "redneck" is:

A redneck was originally named that because when they got a haircut, the barber would shave the back of their neck, and apply alcohol to reduce the risk of infection (kind of like aftershave). The alcohol would cause the back of the neck to turn red briefly, hence the term.
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Old 04-03-2007, 11:22 AM   #79
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I had wondered about the term "cracker" as I most recently recall hearing it in a scene from O Brother Where Art Thou:

Governor Menelaus 'Pappy' O'Daniel (Charles Durning): "I'm not here yo make a record, you dumb cracker. They broadcast me out on the radio."

Followed shortly by:

Junior O'Daniel (Del Pentecost): "Well, ain't you gonna press the flesh, Pappy? Do a little politickin'?"
Pappy O'Daniel: "I'll press your flesh, you dimwhitted sumbitch. You don't tell your pappy how to court the electorate. We ain't on-at-a-timin' here. We're mass communicatin'!"

It wasn't a term I'd ever heard used... I thought it must have been a colloqualism from the South in the '30s...

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Old 04-03-2007, 12:55 PM   #80
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this thread is great! the explanition of a red neck to me was the sun burned neck that was not covered... between your hat and collar... while you worked outside!
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Old 04-03-2007, 01:25 PM   #81
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You are ALL funny. When we purchased our Land (to build our house) there were no roads and we were the first on the plot of land. We purchased 3 acres. Neighbors....not close. And lived in a trailer and build our home.

We have a woods on our left, an apple orchard to our right and down the end
a creek running quitely. We always thought the house could be less but the area where the house sits....should be FREE of Neighbors.
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Old 04-03-2007, 02:34 PM   #82
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Too funny to see this thread pop up. And on a day when I happened to log in.

We've had our ups & downs here on the river. Major falling-out with Chrissy that I had to ride out (nutjob across the road told her that I'd ratted her out to the cops for planting pot in MY yard, which makes no sense if you think about it).

Nutjob & his buddies call me "The Psycho" and the feeling is mutual. Other outsiders have echoed my opinion that this is an uncommonly unfriendly area of the state, not sure why.

But life is OK. One more Airstream sitting in the driveway (and yet another sitting far away, waiting for me to retrieve it, so nothing new there) ...

I've been taking welding & Autocad classes at the local community college, loving all that ...

Being on the river has turned me into a rabid bird watcher, so I put up lots of feeders & while away many hours with the binoculars. And gardening down here is an absolute pleasure. It's not quite the life I envisioned living in my 40s, but day-to-day I'm content to have all of my limbs & most of my wits about me.

Oh, Pick, I would be your absolute nightmare neighbor. It got so bad last summer that Tom paid me $40 to mow my lawn. And I never raked up my leaves. That's a big neighborhood scandal.

And JohnHD ... b'friend & I narrowly missed buying 500 acres in Trempeleau (sp?). That area was pretty weird, too, but I did see a nice Flying Cloud.
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Old 04-03-2007, 02:42 PM   #83
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Oh, here's a shot of my garden last fall. I built quickie beds using cardboard from the move, whatever mulch I could get my hands on & a truckload of soil. Worked pretty good, plus their sand-filled swingset area turned out to be a GREAT planting area. That's where these flowers in this pic are at. Bonus pic is of the swans that panhandle up & down the river. They are so cool.
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Of course I'm an elitist. Look around you.
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Old 04-03-2007, 02:46 PM   #84
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OK guys - my moniker demands it! The name "Cracker" comes from the sound a bullhide whip makes - as used by the early Florida cowboys. Few people realize that Florida is second only to Texas with respect to the number of cattle raised - and, to the best of my knowlege, that holds true even today. The interior of Florida - an area seldom seen by the average visitor - used to have ranches under single ownership that stretched uninterrupted from north of Ocala, Florida south to the Everglades - a distance of several hundred miles (---probably inclusive of a good portion of Disney World.) Even as late as the 70's large landholders, like the grocery store chain Winn-Dixie, had foreman that patrolled their ranches by airplane. That may still be true today. I finished up construction of a corrugated box plant for St. Regis paper company, back around 1963, located at the crossroads of U.S. 27 and SR 70, near a corner general store called the Bears Den. Florida cowboys were still quite evident at that time, however they patrolled the fence lines with pickups and jeeps - and the bullhide whip was no longer seen. They did, however, still carry the old faithful six-shooter in a holster. There was quite a bit of rustling going on (---using tractor trailer rigs backed up to a remote fence line) and these were not the types you wanted to meet up with - neither the Cowboys or the Rustlers! As years went by, it became common practice to call anyone from Florida a "Cracker."
It was a bit more polite than calling them a "Redneck" - but about half the descriptions Jeff Foxworthy uses to describe a "Redneck" shore did fit a lot of my old buddies!


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