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Old 03-24-2014, 07:22 AM   #1
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A Very Different Kind of Life

Thought I would start a new thread, to touch base here and there (en masse )with the friends and many supporters here, many of whom I have never met, who helped me through the recent loss of my beloved husband, Doug.

Some are asking if I am planning to sell the Interstate, do I plan to continue to travel, am I still going to be on AirForums, etc.

I don't intend to leave the Forums, but am not feeling very light-hearted right now nor interested in much reading or posting. I haven't crocheted a stitch, either, since this happened two weeks ago yesterday. Not one stitch. Many of you know I am a compulsive crochet-er, just can't do it right now. I was crocheting next to him on the couch when this happened.

I have no intention of selling the Interstate, and can see some destination traveling down the road....as opposed to the wandering Doug and I did together in retirement.

I have old and new friends I will still want to spend time with, people I want to meet, and rallies I don't intend to miss until I am dead myself or simply too old to do it. Favorite places such as Edisto Beach to return to (buried a shell from there with Doug), as well. See myself going back to favorite places and spending time there.

My grandchildren want to continue to go and do in the Interstate, as well, and we are planning to follow thru with the week-long trip to Wisconsin that we already had planned for this summer. We've talked about it, and plan to make it happen. They are big enough to be a great help, and really wonderful children.

My daughter and her husband are still here from NYC, they going back today. Death certificates should be here tomorrow, and there is still a lot to do.

So, I'm here, feeling rather self-centered, and would love to have any who wish to drop in on this thread to say howdy.

I'll be back here once or twice a day.


XO Maggie
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Old 03-24-2014, 07:35 AM   #2
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Good to hear from you, and good to hear that you're doing as well as can be expected. I kind of regret that when you guys stopped in at Middendorf's that one time I had other plans and couldn't make it. Didn't know then that I'd never again have the chance to meet both of you; hopefully I'll still have the chance to meet you, at least.
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Old 03-24-2014, 08:02 AM   #3
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I wish I had words of wisdom for you, Maggie, but most anything I might say would sound trite, to say the least. You have a right to feel self-centered, I think. Your forum family will continue to be here for you!

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Old 03-24-2014, 08:06 AM   #4
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Howdy.... you are loved.

Take as much time as you need to grieve, but plan to attend a rally sometime this summer. If you're not quite up to going to one, just find a venue that will take a motley crew, and I'll be part of the caravan that brings a rally to a park near you.

Crocheting - throw away the piece you were working on. Start crocheting again when you find a project that will bring someone else joy - "going home" blankets for the nearest NICU unit might feel right.

Paula
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Old 03-24-2014, 08:18 AM   #5
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Maggie please remember that we're all praying for you as you transition to this new and different life. When the funeral is over, and all the people are gone, there are some lonely and sad times to get through. Cry as much as you need to. Learn to let go of the sadness and hang on to good memories. Take care of yourself.
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Old 03-24-2014, 08:33 AM   #6
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Yup, it really isn't the destination...it's the journey. So, you will find the crochet compulsion will return, as well as the wanderlust to go see and do. At first, the memories flood back with discomfort, then nostalgia, and then (believe it or not), you start to smile when you remember silly things. The best part is that you have FAMILY available. And all of us. Not shabby at all!
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Old 03-24-2014, 11:04 AM   #7
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I'm thinking it's ok to be self centered for a while.


Thinking of you.
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Old 03-24-2014, 11:36 AM   #8
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Maggie, we are all thinking of you. The travel with the grandchildren sound wonderful. We are just heartbroken for you about Doug.
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Old 03-24-2014, 12:08 PM   #9
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Maggie, you are on the right track and the right direction. You are providing the way down a path many of us will travel in the future, you are doing it with grace and dignity and I thank you for that.

Jim
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Old 03-24-2014, 01:18 PM   #10
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Maggie, a little self centered stuff is just fine for now. Let the world take care of itself.

It's been just over two years now since my Pam passed away. Grief is a very powerful thing and it still makes an appearance for me every once in awhile, but I'm mostly ok now. It took me a long time to really care about anything again and I spent a lot of time just going through the motions of life. I don't think there's much control over the grieving process--it is in control. Early on it was hard to enjoy the cool places I went with my little Airstream as I just wished so much that Pam could be there to share it. Special places do finally win out, though. Things get better again.

Please give yourself the time you need to get through this.

-steve
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Old 03-24-2014, 01:50 PM   #11
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Hi Maggie,

We have never met, nor have we ever spoken. I do spend some time here in the forums however, and recently learned of your loss. While I have no words to express my feelings about how you must feel, I felt compelled to let you know that you and yours have been in my thoughts and prayers daily over the past couple of weeks.

The support that this "AirFamily" has shown for you and Doug makes me feel grateful for being here. Reminds me how blessed I am to be given the opportunity to feel the freedom that you and Doug shared on the road. I look forward to the memories that I will create with my family and friends. After all, the rest is just stuff and I would trade it all for the time spent with loved ones and share in all the memories that will be created.

My hope is that you hang onto each and every memory with a tight fist and one day in the future they bring a smile to your face and peace to your heart.

God bless.
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Old 03-24-2014, 02:09 PM   #12
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Forgot to mention that we have about $900 in donations to FaithWorks, just from the funeral and cards sent. Many other donations I've been told have been sent directly to them. Had an email from Wright Culpepper (one of the great names of all time) that they had received about $600 as of Friday.

Doug has spoiled me so. Such a jump-in-and-help guy, he ran the vacuum, dusted, took out the garbage, chopped vegetables, brought in the firewood, etc. Whatever needed to be done, he was there to help with it.

I was so used to just getting out of bed and on with my day that the bed hadn't been made since I've been home....til this morning, when I made myself go back in and take care of it.

Am signed up for and planning to attend the Moraine View rally in June, which is just 20 minutes from our house. Would have been our 5th consecutive year at that rally, and a place where I will feel very comfortable.

A new normal, as they say.

I'd rather not, but here it is.

Thanks to you all,


Maggie
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Old 03-24-2014, 02:52 PM   #13
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Hi Maggie,
Thinkin' 'bout you, camping at Moraine View, laughs, sharing knitting/crochet items and cabitzing about everything else. Hoping to see you at MV this year to continue our conversations. June is several months away yet time seems to pass very quickly in these golden years. Dana(part of airtandem)
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Old 03-24-2014, 03:12 PM   #14
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Maggie,

This is going to be an enormous change for you so don't expect too much of yourself. One foot in front of the other and so it goes. One day at a time. Try to find something special about each day. Let it be the sunshine, a warm breeze, a smile on a little girl, your pet. Whatever you can get a moment of enjoyment from. Take a deep breath. Its ok to cry, to smile, and you will always have wonderful memories from your many years together. Remember we are all here for you.

You are a special lady and I send you a big hug.
See you in the not too distant future.

Kate
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Old 03-24-2014, 05:31 PM   #15
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You are living my biggest fear. Loosing my everything person... My soulmate.
I live every day like our first and maybe last.
Best wishes to you in finding your north again.
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Old 03-24-2014, 05:55 PM   #16
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Howdy, Maggie.
I've typed in a lot of stuff in this little box, and then untyped it. What I can say is, our door is always open.




What has happened to you has reaffirmed my determination to make sure Marie is able to hitch up the trailer, break camp, dump tanks, and be able to at least drive the truck and trailer home. She doesn't know it yet, but she's going to be going through a refresher course this weekend...
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Old 03-24-2014, 06:07 PM   #17
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Maggie:

Like many others, we are thinking of you and praying for your strength needed in the days ahead.

You were very fortunate to have been instructed and shared in the mechanical side of the camping experience. When I get our trailer back from the solar installation, I plan to let my wife begin the share the mechanical experience starting with just driving the big truck by itself and processing forward.

Every day is a gift, and I want to be sure to keep that mind set and keep loved ones in mind.
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Old 03-24-2014, 06:15 PM   #18
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Maggie,

OK, so what is the next DO bread recipe? Sorry we can't see you and Doug demonstrate the loaf this weekend, sure was looking forward to tasting that loaf.

If you've gotten to know Maggie, Doug, DO bread and crocheting were pretty special for her.

Nothing but respect and hugs from here Maggie.

Gary
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Old 03-24-2014, 06:33 PM   #19
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Terry, one of the reasons we wanted a Class B was so that I could drive it in the event of an emergency.....thinking broken leg, arm, etc. I always told Doug nothing better happen to him if we were in the mountains, as they would have to send someone to get him and also someone to drive the Interstate down. I have a terrible fear of heights.

I was so flustered when I went back to the campground to get the RV (the owner of A Big Wheel RV Park came to the hospital to get me), then follow the ambulance from Saint Marys to Brunswick, that I couldn't have done much even tho I knew how. Doug was alive, and I was glad, as I hadn't yet digested the ER doc's implication that he was not sure we had saved much after 30+ minutes of CPR.

Fellow campers unhooked everything and got things inside, then topped my propane tank off to make sure the frig would run. Such wonderful people, one of whom was a nurse who took over chest compressions, and another kept Lily til my son could get out to pick her up.

Had in the mail when I got home a refund for my last night at the campground, and a note of sympathy/prayers. Me who packed up and pulled out about 6pm. They didn't have to give a refund, and I certainly didn't expect one.

The people who own and run this campground are the reason we go back there. Good, kind, wonderful folks, reflected in their care of this lovely place and interactions with their guests. The place was full up when we were there, not surprising.

Everyone should know the basics, that is true, but in an emergency you're likely to need help. Your brain isn't working properly and your hands just don't do what they're supposed to.

My wonderful son, his wife and their 3 sweet punkins took the train to Chicago for a few days (spring break here), so I have their little Milo as well as Lily.

I feel like the dog whisperer....every time I move in the house I have the two of them, tails awaggin', at my heels. There were some turf issues at bedtime last night. Not sure what the issue was, but some snarling and barking from alpha Lily. They generally get along very well. Maybe she thought Milo wanted her bed, but she wouldn't let him get to his. Finally moved his and they settled down for the night.


Maggie
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Old 03-24-2014, 06:58 PM   #20
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Maggie,

I don't have the correct words of comfort, but know that you remain in my families prayers and that we hope to meet you one day.
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