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Old 04-14-2014, 08:16 PM   #141
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Dear Friend

Maggie, I have followed all this thread and the other thread re: Doug's passing. Although we have never met the two of you my wife and I have followed many of the posts and threads that Doug and you have been a part of since you began here on the forums and we so much wanted to state how very sorry we were to hear of Doug's passing. We are not the type folks to impose on others feelings but I must tell you that thru all of this you have shown great strength and dignity in dealing so well with a very difficult life experience. I just really want to say that there is nothing you can say here that will ever change our opinion of you or how you have dealt with your very personal loss. We support you and look forward to seeing you return to the things that the two of you enjoyed so much. The sharing and caring for and about others are just what you and Doug are all about....Don't change a Bit! I do want to make a suggestion to you. Here Goes.... I think you need to spend some alone time in the Interstate while it is parked there at the house. Perhaps take a nice hot cup of tea (In you new cup) out there and just let the quiet space inside the cabin of the Interstate speak to you. This was a very special spot for the two of you and a place where I think you will find a little peace of a different kind that may help you to more fully get back to the camping and company that the two of you fully enjoyed. As it was the place where Doug had his trauma it will have a very lasting part of his spirit still there I believe. I think you will have a extra comfort to find your memory of him strong there and not as just the spot of his trauma. Please use this advise as you will. We hope you have many beautiful memories for many years to come. Sincerely, Ed and Carol Carver
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Old 04-15-2014, 04:48 AM   #142
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Thank you for the lovely letter, Ed & Carol. Are you coming to Moraine View the second weekend in June? It is always a great rally.

Spending some quiet time out in the Interstate is a really good idea. I'm sure it would bring me a great deal of comfort.

We had a wonderful 6 1/2 years traveling the country. What a privilege to have been able to do that together. We knew that, and spoke of it most every day.

Right now, however, sitting out there would not bring me peace and comfort. It is chaos. I need to take myself firmly in hand and spend an hour or so some morning vacuuming, putting away and cleaning a bit, so that I can then sit and enjoy it in peace.

It won't take that long, as it's small, I'm just avoiding it and the new rush of memories.

I've been talking to myself about this, however, and intend to make myself deal with it once the weather warms up again.

I feel a bit as if I turned a small corner yesterday, not sure exactly why.

Thanks to you all,

XO Maggie
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Old 04-15-2014, 08:22 AM   #143
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Maggie, congratulations on your new certification! My husband and I went thru the Red Cross to get our CPR certifications years ago when our son was small, he has Epilepsy and any seizure could be "the big one" for him. We do not take his seizures lightly, we've lived with the fear of losing him to a seizure every day for the last 24yrs, but we must keep reality in place otherwise if it ever does happen....I just don't care to think about that. After reading of your going thru this certification, I've realized that we are in need of an updated refresher coarse, I believe CPR is done entirely differently now.

I believe Ed and Carol's suggestion may be a good one in your time. It is one that I'm going to try to remember in case I am ever in the same situation.

Speaking of weather -- we awoke to snow on the ground again, after having 80 degree weather a day or so ago!! How crazy is this!? They've also said that we'll have a killer freeze tonight -- 4 hours of 24 degrees or less will kill all of our daffodils, hyacinths, etc. and will more than likely do in our peaches, apples, etc. Such a sad summer this will be to not have those to look forward to.

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Old 04-15-2014, 08:48 AM   #144
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It would be good information for anyone to know, I believe, and I am sure there are places that offer it for free periodically. It is very basic, how-to-save-a-life training that covers cardiac, diabetic, choking, etc., emergencies that anyone could be exposed to.

I was still at the 5-compressions-to-one-breath stage of CPR, and it has evolved in a couple of stages since then to 30-compressions-to-2-rescue-breaths as one cycle.

Plastic shields for lay persons doing mouth-to-mouth are also readily available, in inexpensive, single-use packets that attach to your key ring. I'm going to get a couple of those.

http://www.redcrossstore.org/shopper...LocationId=120

It is common for people to vomit when receiving CPR, which Doug did, and the shields would be good to have for anyone prepared to step in and do mouth-to-mouth. Aside from stomach contents, there are a number of serious diseases passed thru bodily fluids.

Our trainer yesterday felt so strongly about the use of these shields that he said he would focus on chest compressions, solely, while a first aid kit/breath shields were obtained or while waiting for EMT's to arrive. It makes a lot of sense, really.

There is even a chest-compression-only version of CPR, for people who don't want to do rescue breaths.

At any rate, I am better prepared now.


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Old 04-15-2014, 04:12 PM   #145
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For anyone looking for a post on my hearing Theresa Caputo speak, that is actually Thursday the 17th, not Tuesday the 17th as I thought.

I might get her book re-read before then, which I did want to do.


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Old 04-15-2014, 07:11 PM   #146
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Maggie, it's wonderful that you completed this certification. I think everyone should be qualified to administer CPR, and knowledge is (indeed) power. Equipment also matters, as you mentioned above. Cardiac arrhythmia -- while not epidemic -- is most assuredly something most of us don't expect. I have decided to buy an AED for SilverLeaf -- you can buy one for under $900 now. I've done so many cosmetic and comfort mods to my trailer that it seems that an AED would complement the fairly complete first aid kit which I already have. And, I would make an announcement at every A/S rally that I have an AED .... "just in case." Barry
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Old 04-15-2014, 08:33 PM   #147
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CPR and AED

Barry and all,
Everyone should read the complete information on the official Heart Association.org site regarding AED's, this is part of it:

What is an AED?
The automated external defibrillator (AED) is a computerized medical device. An AED can check a person’s heart rhythm. It can recognize a rhythm that requires a shock. The AED uses voice prompts, lights and text messages to tell the rescuer the steps to take.
What's the AHA position on placement of AEDs?
When AEDs are placed in the community or facility, the AHA strongly encourages that they be part of a defibrillation program in which:
• Persons that acquire an AED notify the local EMS office.
• A licensed physician or medical authority provides medical oversight to ensure quality control.
• Persons responsible for using the AED are trained in CPR and how to use an AED.

Persons that acquire an AED notify the local EMS office.
A licensed physician or medical authority provides medical oversight to ensure quality control. Persons responsible for using the AED are trained in CPR and how to use an AED.
Why is notifying the local EMS office important?
It's important for the local EMS system to know where AEDs are located in the community.
Why should a licensed physician or medical authority be involved with purchasers of AEDs?
This is a quality control mechanism. The licensed physician or medical authority will ensure that all designated responders are properly trained and that the AED is properly maintained.

Why should people who are responsible for operating an AED receive CPR training?
Early CPR is an integral part of providing lifesaving aid to people suffering sudden cardiac arrest. CPR helps to circulate oxygen-rich blood to the brain. After the AED is attached and delivers a shock, the typical AED will prompt the operator to continue CPR while the device continues to analyze the victim.
If AEDs are so easy to use, why do people need formal training in how to use them?
An AED operator must know how to recognize the signs of a sudden cardiac arrest, when to activate the EMS system, and how to do CPR. It's also important for operators to receive formal training on the AED model they will use so that they become familiar with the device and are able to successfully operate it in an emergency. Training also teaches the operator how to avoid potentially hazardous situations.
Can anyone buy an AED?
AEDs are manufactured and sold under guidelines approved by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA). The FDA may require someone who purchases an AED to present a physician's prescription for the device.
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Old 04-15-2014, 08:45 PM   #148
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I already have Red Cross First Aid and CPR Certification. The Red Cross also offers a separate certificate for AED, though I haven't done this. Yet. No big deal. (I have to chuckle at all of the "strongly encourages" from the AHA.) There are AEDs in almost every public building, every commercial aircraft and fitness center and large office building....to name but a few. These devices were designed for a complete NOVICE. I have had the demo and feel very comfortable with it. I work out in a small fitness studio three times a week. They even have one. It makes me feel just a bit more comfortable, which is how I'll feel with one in my Airstream.
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Old 04-16-2014, 12:01 PM   #149
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Well, I put my Gorilla Cart to use this morning and did some serious yard clean-up. A very handy and easy to use item, should have gotten one years ago. Fill it up, pull it to where you want it, pull the handle and dump. Couldn't be easier.

Doug's preferred method of leaf/debris removal was to rake everything into large piles, then onto a tarp, then drag the tarp to the curb to dump. A little more strength and large motor coordination than I am convinced I have. I would help rake, of course, but he did all the heavy, awkward schlepping and hauling. It's what men do, he would say.

Speaking of which, I carried 35 lbs of dog food into the house yesterday, along with a couple of heavy bags of groceries (Easter dinner coming up....I, of course, cook). I haven't carried heavy items in longer than I can remember, as Doug was always right there, ready to do the guy stuff. I can do it, of course, and my muscles will be stronger and happier because of it. I was rather spoiled, in many ways.

Navigated my way to rugby games and back over the weekend, drove in the dark , got my CPR/AED certification, hammered a few nails, carried heavy things and did yard work so far this week. Bringing firewood in a couple of times a week. It feels good.

Am past the one-month point, before which it was easy to look back at what was happening one, two, three weeks ago on this day of the week. Have stopped doing that, and feel I am starting to move past immediate trauma and into recovery-and-start-to-move-forward mode.

Everything still reminds me of him, but I talk to him every day, blow kisses at his pictures and feel he is watching over me.

I can do this, I tell myself, and hear him saying "Yes, you can".

Threads here are starting to catch my eye, but I'm not quite ready to rejoin that group. Soon, though, at which point I'm going to have a Mod close this thread.

Not til after I have posted about hearing Theresa Caputo speak tomorrow night, though.

Thanks for being there for me.

XO Maggie
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Old 04-16-2014, 12:52 PM   #150
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Maggie, it sounds like you're doing really well. Always remember too, that Doug would want you to carry on and lead a happy happy life. So, when you start having more and more good days and happy days, embrace them all.
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Old 04-16-2014, 01:32 PM   #151
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Maggie:

Your strength is inspiring. I look forward to reading about your Caputo evening.

I have been researching Dutch oven cooking and plan to pick your brain in September at Lake Wateree. I hope to have purchased a Lodge DO by the time that rally happens.

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Old 04-16-2014, 02:27 PM   #152
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I find myself thinking of you often. Wishing you healing.
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Old 04-16-2014, 02:51 PM   #153
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Thanks, all.

I don't anticipate "happy" anytime soon, but can see "peace" coming.

We and our neighbor to the south had 28 year old ash trees taken down last fall, and we became the recipients of all the wood from both.

Our regular wood-supplier spent 6 hours last Saturday splitting all of this for me, and it is in a huge heap in the backyard....6-7 face cords, he estimated. I will not need to buy firewood for a couple of years.

At any rate, Gorilla Cart and I are working on moving this pile to the stacking area. The cart holds up to 600 pounds, so stacked high with split wood is a piece of cake. I love this cart!

Son and grands will be here Saturday to help me finish it off, but I look to have half of it done by then.

I feel a bit like outdoors-woods-woman......it's a good thing.


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Old 04-16-2014, 04:20 PM   #154
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Hi Maggie... I'll miss this thread when you close... I've found it full of valuable incites and information... thank you for sharing all this.... and I'll see you around the forum...hugs, gail
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Old 04-16-2014, 04:25 PM   #155
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Maggie
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Old 04-17-2014, 07:18 AM   #156
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Maggie, Thank you for sharing. It is helping me.
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Old 04-17-2014, 07:47 AM   #157
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I'm glad to hear that.

We are really all more alike than we are different.


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Old 04-18-2014, 06:40 AM   #158
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Theresa Caputo was amazing.

Just as when I have seen her on TV, she is a very genuine, straightforward, caring and compassionate person. A little ball of fire in very expensive, sparkly shoes.

During about 1hr 45minutes of "readings" with audience members, she nailed specifics about departed loved ones, and those they had left behind, over and over again. Those who got her attention were genuinely shocked and very emotional at what she knew and at the details of messages coming to them from loved ones who had died recently or years ago.

Theresa honed in on a very distraught young woman whose fiancé had recently died, and told her he wants her to stop saying she can't do this without him, that he wants her to live for their baby. The woman had only recently found out she was pregnant, and since the father died. Theresa was obviously worried about this young woman, and told her friends they need to stay close and to watch her.

I put Doug's wedding ring on, and into my bag the tiny pocketknife he carried almost all the time......one which he handed to me hundreds of times to cut yarn. I felt he clearly wanted me to be there, and nudged me strongly to find and attend the show. He also cautioned me not to expect too much in such a venue.... but for beginning to develop a belief and trust that souls exist, stay close to and with their loved ones, and continue to guide and interact with them after death.

I found Theresa's show interesting, highly credible and comforting. At least for me, fully absorbing this will come in stages, rather than be the result of an epiphany of some sort.

Chores today....clean the little house, do some laundry, work on that woodpile. Weather is perfect for such things.

I'm doing okay. Noticing that with this sense of peace and calm that is starting to settle that my bodily signs of stress overload are dissipating.

It's a good thing.


XO Maggie
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Old 04-18-2014, 08:24 AM   #159
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I hope you don't close this thread just yet as I think it is a good connection to your Airstream friends. I was widowed in 1970 with 3 teenagers. He died in his sleep with a massive heart attack. In 2007 I lost Roy to COPD. The loss of your loved one is never easy. Roy insisted we buy our motor home in 2005 as he knew I could not handle our large 5th wheel. We traveled a lot from 1996 until shortly before his death. I have met the most wonderful friends traveling in my motorhome since 2007. I am 78 and still able to attend rallies and take trips to visit family and friends. I feel like Roy is my co-pilot when traveling. You are doing well for now with all the thing that must be done and you will continue to be involved. God Bless you in this journey. Kay
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Old 04-18-2014, 08:48 AM   #160
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Thank you, Kay, and good to hear how you have continued to travel. I plan to do the same....just not quite yet.

Not looking to close this thread right now, but feel a shift coming and getting close to getting into other threads again.

I guess I can do both, now can't I.


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