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Old 10-10-2014, 05:47 PM   #799
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Yep.

I have mixed feelings about it, as it is a separation.....and something I chose, rather than one which was thrust upon me......like widowhood.

I'm not going to change it back, Janet......who, when I said it looked and felt odd, encouraged me to wait quietly for normalcy. A wise woman. That's why she's a moderator.

Seemed like the right thing to do at this point, and still does. Doug never posted on these Forums, and seldom read them....altho sometimes I would quote him ..so it is not like I am taking away or changing his posts or user name.

doug&maggie has always, only, been Maggie posting.....altho Doug's Maggie is who I was for a very long time and Doug&Maggie is on our license plate frame and reflects our joined-at-the-hip retirement life. We liked it that way, most days.

7 months ago on this date, we were in the ICU in Brunswick, Georgia. Both of my kids and Doug's daughter had arrived, and we were hoping he would wake up and say "what the h--l"??


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Old 10-10-2014, 06:06 PM   #800
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Speaking of Lily......she dragged the mostly eaten remains of a rabbit to the back door this afternoon, thinking she would bring it inside and finish it off. I think not. It looked fresh, blood was still red. Had to have been a cat that got into our back yard during the night.

Post-extended trips, I was always glad to get home to my little house and especially my kitchen. That doesn't seem to have changed, as I have cooked something every day this week....including a loaf of wheat and one of rye DO bread in my oven.....sliced up and stashed in the freezer to be consumed at my leisure.

Was really good to be gone, now good to be home.


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Old 10-10-2014, 06:37 PM   #801
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Take care, Maggie, I think of you and your new journey often. Sounds like Lily wants you to know she can help provide for the family
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Old 10-10-2014, 06:41 PM   #802
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Thank you, Stephanie.

I don't know that Lily would have shared that rabbit carcass with me, but then..I didn't ask.

She is certainly my protector...to a fault, I'm told.


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Old 10-10-2014, 08:21 PM   #803
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lily&Me View Post
And, someone over the weekend, who didn't know, asked about my "we-speak", thinking I had a spouse or partner who hadn't yet showed themselves at the rally. That happens sometimes.

When I do "I-speak", it requires a very conscious effort on my part. My preference seems to be to cling to the "we", as it is what rolls most naturally off my tongue......and, I am telling myself that Lily and I are a "we"....but really it is mostly that I just don't want to let go of it.

And, it's okay. I will let go of it when I am ready.
I still do "we speak" and it's been nearly four years since I lost Pam. Not going to change, I don't think. I just tell everyone that I mean Brissy the cat and me. Sometimes that's true.

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Old 10-10-2014, 08:23 PM   #804
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Old 10-11-2014, 06:00 AM   #805
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Evenings on the IPad:

Grieving is not a short-term process; it's not even a long-term process; it's a lifelong process. 'Having a future' now means that although your life will flow again, it will flow differently as a result of the loss. Your grief will become incorporated into your life history, become a part of your identity. And you will continue now, and forever, to redefine your relationship with your deceased loved one. Death doesn't end the relationship, it simply forges a new type of relationship - one based not on physical presence but on memory, spirit, and love.
~ Transcending Loss by Ashley Davis Bush


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Old 10-11-2014, 06:43 AM   #806
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Very nice Maggie...
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Old 10-11-2014, 06:51 AM   #807
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Thank you.....the comforting and emotionally grounding words of others.

I've started sending some of these to my daughter, who, since I've been home, I've been able to Skype with and see her face since they lost their baby.

Although she spoke very realistic words about the risks of pregnancy at 38, how much could go wrong in the first few months, etc., they were completely unprepared for the baby dying in utero and the trauma of a medically induced abortion.

They never held that baby, but had it, nonetheless, and are grieving.

Maybe Mummie going thru the loss of her spouse and best friend has prepared me some for understanding and helping her.


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Old 10-11-2014, 07:09 AM   #808
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When we lost our beloved Brittney Spaniel 10 years or so ago, Doug and I cried off and on for 3 days.

One of the things we came to realize was that the loss of a loved one can resurrect every loss you ever suffered, physcal or emotional, human or situational, by death or other trauma.

Those early periods are, in part, so overwhelming because the pain of other losses rise to the surface and compound the present.

Losing a pet is not the same as losing a human, but those bonds run just as deep, as any pet lover knows.


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Old 10-11-2014, 07:30 AM   #809
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A cold-weather morning....coffee and a fire.


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Old 10-12-2014, 07:15 AM   #810
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Lily has brought a hindquarter, spinal column, little feet...and, this morning, what appears to be the hide of a rabbit.

To the back door, or inside, if I didn't see it first. That should be the last of it, unless there's another foot out there somewhere. I haven't been counting.

Everything picked clean, and the hide nothing but fur and skin.

That is one efficient little eater, that cat.

Park personnel tell us that the wild cats in their parks do very well....able to catch small animals for food, also to climb trees to get away from coyotes and other predators.

I have a new respect for cats.


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Old 10-12-2014, 11:11 AM   #811
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'Tis Sunday at home, which means dinner with my family.

This week, as I have been gone, at Grandma's house. I have a favorite apple crisp recipe in the oven, which I thought I would share here, as recipes always seem to be appreciated.

I cut this out of the local newspaper at least 30 years ago. It is delicious, has very little fat in it, and a yummy, sugar-cookie type, crunchy crust.

I use a deep casserole dish and double the filling recipe, which makes for much more apple than crust, which we like. I use Spenda Brown for the sugar in the filling, which cuts that a bit, and a mixture of Granny Smith, Mcintosh and Jonathon apples....whatever is at a good price.

Farm-Style Apple Crisp

6 cups sliced apples
1 cup sugar
2 tablespoons flour
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
Mix dry ingredients together, then mix thoroughoy with apple slices. Pour into a greased baking dish. Dot with about 2 tablespoons butter, cut up.

Mix:
1 cup flour
1 cup sugar
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon salt
Beat a large egg separately, then stir into dry mixture with fork. This will be crumbly and not stick together... just incorporate well.

Spread topping over apples and bake at 325 degrees for about 1 hour.

Enjoy!


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Old 10-12-2014, 02:54 PM   #812
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Hi Maggie!!! I'll try that recipe as soon as we get home... there are apples waiting!!!we're at an Airstream Rally in Jackson, California... great group, great place... heading back to Astoria tomorrow... get there Tuesday... been totally fun here, as usual... all right, keep having fun... hugs and love to you and Lily , gail
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