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Old 08-30-2014, 12:40 PM   #641
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That was my thought, Page....that Doug sent me that song, just as I was thinking of our trip.

It seems that music will be a key form of messages, for him, which is not surprising, given his great love of a wide variety of music. Much more so than me.

It is comforting.


Maggie
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Old 08-30-2014, 02:46 PM   #642
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Originally Posted by doug&maggie View Post
The European Market in Chesterton was very, very enjoyable. Got there just before 8am, as things were opening up, as rain is due in later today.

All manner of homemade foods, from pastries and jams to fresh, hot, homemade tamales. One of my favorite foods of all time. Bought a dozen, which will feed me several times. Scrumptious.

Soaps, woodenwares, pottery, glass, jewelry, etc., plus fresh flowers and a large selection of fresh fruits and vegetables. A mental bookmark for a return trip.

Also, a couple of vendors selling homemade dog treats and several places with water bowls out for the all manner of dogs that were welcome and present. Lily was a happy girl, strolling around with me.....in her harness and on her short leash, keeping her alpha-ness in check in a high-stimulation environment.

Admiring items in a booth selling those rather filmy, colorful, poncho-y, scarfy things for women, that can be worn 5 or 6 different ways, I was talking with the lady there about how great these would be for travel. Also, thinking to myself about our trip to Paris in 2012 for our 20th wedding anniversary, when I could have used this very item.

Just then, across the way, a man with an accordion begins playing "La vie en Rose". One of our first days in Paris, a man with an accordion was playing that very song, by the Seine.

I bought a scarfy thing and went to drop some money in the accordion player's bin....and talk to him a minute. He was French, also loves Edith Piaf and was sad for her tortured life. She was born in a brothel, as I recall, and discovered while singing for tips on a street corner.

That particular song is quintessential Paris....and Edith Piaf, who Doug has loved since first learning about her in high school French class. We have a CD of her music, and watched a movie about her very difficult life and career.....could put her CD in and be instantly transported back to Paris....sitting outside, drinking coffee from tiny cups.



Found a laundromat and washed everything up, then got myself back to the campground with only one wrong turn. Widowhood has required learning to drive all over again, paying attention to directions and landmarks, as Doug drove almost all the time and I simply didn't pay attention to such things. I do now.

It's been a nice day, and good to be out among others. One can spend an inordinate amount of time alone, is the truth.

Hope everyone is having a good holiday weekend.

Thanks for being here.


Maggie
Thanks, Maggie, Doug, and Edith for being here!

Bill

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Old 08-31-2014, 09:41 AM   #643
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One life ends, and another begins.....so goes the circle of life.

Grandchild #10 is due in April 2015.

My social worker daughter and her police detective husband (we love him), who married last year, are expecting their first child. They are over the moon with delight.

I am so happy for them, and for me.....and somewhere, Doug is smiling.


Maggie
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Old 08-31-2014, 10:56 AM   #644
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I, too, believe Doug is sending you messages, and I've been told by a Sensitive that it is very hard for those who have passed to do things to get our attention -- they have to work hard at having it happen.

I am wondering, is the harness you use for Lily the one which curbs "pulling"? Our Goldendoodle is very large and extremely strong, he could easily pull us down if we don't keep a firm hold on the leash. I noticed the harnesses which do this in a catalog we receive and was thinking of trying one. We have used the "gentle leaders", but since they go around the snout, some people think they are a "muzzle" and are being used to keep him from biting, which isn't the problem at all. He's a lover and I don't want people to think he's aggressive, so I was looking for something different to use. As soon as we put a gentle leader on him, he stops jumping and pulling, tho.

The European Market you went to sounds wonderful. For some time, I've been thinking of starting some type of a file to keep by state, then by cities, of interesting cities; nice campgrounds; museums; markets; etc. so that when we're in an area, we can look it over for a reference of where to stay/do. I think I need to get started on this and add in the campground you stayed in this week and this European Market. Thanks for sharing the info.

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Old 08-31-2014, 11:54 AM   #645
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Originally Posted by doug&maggie View Post
One life ends, and another begins.....so goes the circle of life.

Grandchild #10 is due in April 2015.

My social worker daughter and her police detective husband (we love him), who married last year, are expecting their first child. They are over the moon with delight.

I am so happy for them, and for me.....and somewhere, Doug is smiling.


Maggie
Hi, Maggie; I have always thought the same thing. Someone leaves this world and a new one arrives. Seems to me that you are doing quite well. Happy to hear that you are out and about with Lili too.
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Old 08-31-2014, 12:29 PM   #646
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I, too, believe Doug is sending you messages, and I've been told by a Sensitive that it is very hard for those who have passed to do things to get our attention -- they have to work hard at having it happen.

I am wondering, is the harness you use for Lily the one which curbs "pulling"? Our Goldendoodle is very large and extremely strong, he could easily pull us down if we don't keep a firm hold on the leash. I noticed the harnesses which do this in a catalog we receive and was thinking of trying one. We have used the "gentle leaders", but since they go around the snout, some people think they are a "muzzle" and are being used to keep him from biting, which isn't the problem at all. He's a lover and I don't want people to think he's aggressive, so I was looking for something different to use. As soon as we put a gentle leader on him, he stops jumping and pulling, tho.

The European Market you went to sounds wonderful. For some time, I've been thinking of starting some type of a file to keep by state, then by cities, of interesting cities; nice campgrounds; museums; markets; etc. so that when we're in an area, we can look it over for a reference of where to stay/do. I think I need to get started on this and add in the campground you stayed in this week and this European Market. Thanks for sharing the info.

Deb
Thanks, Robert.

Deb, thank you.

We bought this harness at Petco, I think. They did not recommend the "gentle leader", as I recall, for Lily. We had taken her (and us) to dog school there last year, explaining her issues with other dogs. They could also see her gentle and sweet disposition, and were very helpful. She is a better dog, and we/I better owners for the class and conversations with them.

This harness is intended to curb pulling, also to mimic the "correction" that a mother dog would do with a pup.....which is grasping them behind the neck.

The harness hooks in front, across the chest, so that when they pull, the pressure they feel is on the opposite side of the harness, behind the neck. I call it her "I'm a submissive" harness, because just fastening it on her makes all the difference, immediately.

Interestingly, when we first came home with it and held it out to put it on her, she stepped into it as if she knew exactly what it was, and that it was for her. May have come from her prior life, or maybe she's just that smart.

We also bought one of those leashes that has the extra handle, making a very short leash so that you can pull them very close, very quickly, very easily. When I see and can anticipate Lily is going to go for another dog, I pull her close and she gives me no problem. If she can go at another dog, she has to snarl and snap, and appear she will tear it to shreds. She doesn't, of course, just has to dominate and appear that she will.

I guess, in the great scheme of things, now that I am alone it is good to have a dog who sounds like she would tear a throat out. Ain't nobody gonna be messin' with me with Lily around. They would have to get past those big, white teeth.

I have since heard that alphas show themselves very soon after birth, and have often wondered if such a sweet, good, dog was abandoned because of it. Whatever, their loss was our gain.

If I didn't have Lily, I would have to find her. I needed her, and even more so, now.

If you haven't done a bit of dog school with yours, Deb, you might consider that. It was under $100 at Petco, pretty basic, but very helpful in Lily becoming more compliant overall.

Maggie
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Old 08-31-2014, 05:25 PM   #647
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Catching up—raccoons can be house trained. I've know people who did that, though I certainly wouldn't. We used to live where two raccoon tribes were battling over territory. It could get pretty nasty in the middle of the night. I figured it would resolve itself, but a neighbor shot most of them. Diagnosing rabies or anything else based on no fear of people and a seizure in a box (I may get a seizure if you put my a box, though I am afraid of humans) may be hasty.

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Old 09-01-2014, 05:56 AM   #648
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Hi Gene,

The consensus among park staff was that the raccoon likely had distemper, and they have apparently had this experience here before.

Last day here, moving up the shore a bit tomorrow and home by the end of the week.

A lovely park. We'll be back.


Maggie

Evenings on the IPad:

No person is truly ever alone.
Those who live no more,
whom we loved,
echo still within our thoughts,
our words, our hearts.
And what they did
and who they were
becomes a part of all that we are,
forever.
~ Richard Fife
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Old 09-01-2014, 05:22 PM   #649
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A Very Different Kind of Life

Was this quote on your IPad this evening, Maggie? If so, wow! Spot on!


Sent from my iPad using Airstream Forums
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Old 09-01-2014, 05:33 PM   #650
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No, I found it some other day, just pulled and posted it today because it seemed apropos.

I have a Pages app for the IPad that allows me to create and save documents.

I have one document in there that is all quotes I have found online and liked.

Copy and paste, there for the plucking when I take a notion, which I did this morning.

Had lunch near the campground today with the very, very nice woman I met here and visited with a couple of days ago. Then, we came back to the campground and spent another 4 hours just sitting around and talking. Lovely.

They had left on Friday, we exchanged contact information. A new friend.

Hope everyone had a good weekend.


Maggie
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Old 09-01-2014, 06:32 PM   #651
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Your stay at that campground sounds idyllic. Wish we could travel this year, but maybe next year.

Gene
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Old 09-01-2014, 06:44 PM   #652
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Your stay at that campground sounds idyllic. Wish we could travel this year, but maybe next year.

Gene
Hi, me too; Our trailer hasn't been out since we brought it to Salem in December. We do have a Rally in October and may make an extended trip out of it.
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Old 09-02-2014, 01:34 PM   #653
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Gave the absolutely filthy Interstate a thorough scrub at a car wash this morning, then headed a bit north for a couple of days.

As the pre-soak is starting, what comes on thru their piped in music but Garth Brooks...

How was I to know
that you'd ever say goodbye?
And now I'm glad,
that I didn't know
the way it all would end,
the way it all would go.
Our lives....are better left to chance.
I could have missed the pain,
but I'd have had to miss the dance.


Been in my head all day. Such a beautiful song. I have not played music since Doug died. Just can't, yet. Music was more his thing. And so, when I hear songs that we loved or were special to us for some reason, I pay close attention.

This has been a good trip for me....not really aimless, but away and completely alone, but for Lily. I had found myself feeling almost phobic of being out of the house for a long time after Doug died. Went out to do what was necessary, then directly home. Sometimes would not leave the house for 3-4 days. It took awhile for this to start to dissipate. Months.

It's better these days. Not great, or even really good, but definitely better. Kind of like putting on someone else's coat, and realizing after some time that you're starting to get used to the feel of it.

Time heals all wounds.


Maggie
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Old 09-03-2014, 02:19 PM   #654
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hi Maggie, that one brought tears to my eyes... I'm going to copy it... thx, hugs and love, gail
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Old 09-03-2014, 02:44 PM   #655
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Awww, thank you, Gail.

What struck me, although we loved Garth Brooks and especially this song (perfect for slow-dancing in the kitchen), was that this was one of the first "Evenings on the IPad" posts.

Does he know about those, I thought to myself. ? My collection of other people's words that have been so comforting and helpful to me? If I'm not adding to them, I'm reading them....most every night.

I know that, whatever comforts me, he would be glad for it. Other people's words, transitional wine, songs that were special to us for whatever reason. All that.

I know he wishes we could have said good-bye, too. My only "if only".

And that, if he can communicate with me from the afterlife....he will.


Maggie


Evenings on the IPad:

He was my North, my South, my East and West,
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;
I thought that love would last forever: I was wrong.
― W.H. Auden
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Old 09-03-2014, 07:25 PM   #656
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Ahhhh, there goes my mascara again!!!
I too believe in hearing from those who've pasted on... it can be subtle, like songs, or dreams like Italy... a "feeling" in the room... animals are more tuned in... Watch Lily, she'll know... more hugs and love from here.. gail
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Old 09-05-2014, 02:25 PM   #657
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Home sweet home.

Was a good trip, peaceful and confidence-building. 11 days, completely by myself.

Drove in rain and high winds yesterday, and stayed on the road. Am emptying and filling tanks like I've been doing it a long time.

Going to do some family stuff, plus choring and those kind of things the next couple of days, then will start to head toward NC and Alumalina on Monday.

Looking forward to it.

All is well, hope the same is true for you.


Maggie
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Old 09-06-2014, 04:44 PM   #658
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And so, came home from Michigan with a pile of luscious peaches. More than I could eat, and I was torn last evening between making jam and starting to do up laundry from the trip.

I found this recipe online, and had in my cupboards everything I needed. So easy, used all the rest of the peaches.... and it cooked while I slept.

Crock-Pot Ladies Crock-Pot Peach Freezer Jam

Absolutely delicious, altho more like a lightly spiced peach butter. I finished mine off with a few seconds with an immersion blender.

I am becoming more accustomed to "doing it all"....loading, unloading, schlepping in and out, washing/hanging/folding, cleaning, restocking...all that. Had things mostly done and the house cleaned up by mid-afternoon, before it occurred to me that this used to be a two-person job.

I remind myself that I am fortunate to have the Interstate, and to still be able to go.

My friend in northern MN had major back surgery on Thursday. She is making a remarkable, speedy recovery and went home today, feeling much better than when she went in. Multiple issues prompted the surgery, and it was worse once they got in there than what was anticipated....but it immediately alleviated debilitating, crippling pain that threatened to put her in a wheelchair.

A good woman. A rock in the pebbled beach of life.

After choring all day, treated myself to Chinese take-out and a soak in the bathtub.

It has cooled off beautifully here. I am hoping for some Smoky Mountains wandering on my way to Alumalina, and cool would be lovely.

Fall has always been my favorite time of year.


Maggie
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Old 09-06-2014, 04:50 PM   #659
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As well it should be with most of us living in our fall....
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Old 09-08-2014, 04:56 AM   #660
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Interstate is packed and ready to go, as are Lily and I.

She watches my in-and-outs closely, thumping her tail each time I return to the house...is it time to go, yet?

My son and I got a latch replaced on one of the galley cabinets yesterday, the screws were in too tight for me, but spare parts were already on hand in the tool bag....purchased and stashed by Doug at some point, as we have replaced a number of these over the years.

Sunday dinners at Grandma's little house have been moved to once a month, the remainder will be at my son's up the street. Holiday dinners, too. All the advantages of a visit and a shared meal, in a house twice the size. They also have a dishwasher.

The larger expanse of their home better absorbs and accommodates the activity level of 3 busy, half-grown young-uns......here, rather like being confined in a small space with three Great Danes....plus Lily, getting in on the fun. It's time.

We're planning an overnight here late fall, where they will help Grandma get wood in, and with the mountains of leaves that will by then need to be gathered up and hauled to the street.....and, we will try out the new toasting forks on hot dogs and marshmallows in the chiminea on the patio.

They have few leaves in their new-ish subdivision, so piles to rake up and play in are a treat they relish and look forward to every year. A childhood rite of passage, although when I was a child you could rake them to the street and burn them. Neighbors would all be out together, visiting, raking and burning.

One of the things I enjoyed about doing after-hours on call duties in the fall, were visits to small towns, and the smell of burning leaves. Loved it.

Need to fill the fresh water tank, and make my final visit to the dentist....don't ask ...and, we're off.

Have a good week.


Maggie

Evenings on the IPad:

"In three words I can sum up everything I have learned about life: It goes on." Robert Frost
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