a take charge kind of person....stemmed from single parenthood of two at a young age, I believe. We parents know that if the parent(s) are not in charge, one of the children will be. I did my best, and have wonderful adult children, so apparently did at least some things well.
I am also a caregiver by nature, and had a career where I was given major messes. My job was to sort things out, figure out what was going on, create order and a plan for resolution......and then insure to the best of my ability that the plan was carried out.
Yep. That was me, and I did it well, but haven't really left my task-oriented nature behind.
I do better letting go than I used to, but there is always that firm self discussion needed.
I miss having my husband to hash things thru with.
It is hard, and I must mightily resist the drive........to create order out of any chaos that comes my way. This mess involves grands, and I cannot fix it.
Doug's mom is not on blood thinners, actually on very little medication at all for a woman nearing 100. I will see her in the morning. Just had a text from SD that they are going to do a colonoscopy tomorrow. I hate for her to go thru that, but they can't just let her bleed to death.
Lily and I have had a very long day.
Kansas to Nebraska to Missouri to Iowa, across swollen rivers, in and amongst very happy corn and soybean fields, and thru detours for a bridge out on the Skunk river. An extra dose of Iowa gravel road dust on the Interstate today.
Are now parked at the cemetery, where Lily has had a good romp, and will stay here tonight. Found a brand new, extra large roll of paper towels had disgorged itself onto the floor while we were driving.
Doug's rose bush is alive and doing very well. Have trimmed it a bit and tidied things up around his grave....widow things.
They were mowing when I pulled in, gave a nod but otherwise paid me no mind, and I settled myself under my usual tree. The benefits of small, old, rural cemeteries.
My first trip out in the Interstate after Doug died last year was here, for Memorial Day weekend.
Having a larger than usual glass of my favorite Riesling.